How good are you to yourself?
I will be the first to admit I am not always that good to myself. I struggle with the feeling that I do not deserve it. I struggle that I am not good enough for certain things. Yet, I recall a session with a friend and she noticed my shoes. They were my most favorite dress shoes and I had put off wearing them because I felt I didn't deserve to wear something I would enjoy. Finally, I had pulled them out of the closet and wore them often with so much happiness that I was finally wearing them. A friend pointed out how tattered they were. She was right, they had aged and began to basically fall apart before I had the chance to wear them. It was then pointed out to me with the most sincerity and care that I do deserve to have and enjoy good things. That I didn't need to wait until those shoes had been falling apart before I wore them. That I should take better care of myself and allow myself to enjoy things.
This reminds me of when I was in college. I worked at Pizza Hut in the college town I lived in and I was fortunate to get along well with majority of everyone who worked there. One of the cooks noticed my elbows and commented about how they needed lotion. I was in a rat race of working two jobs to pay for college while attending college full time. I didn't have the time to take care of myself I was trying to obtain my degree while paying bills. It was when he said to me, "you need to take better care of yourself, take the time to put lotion on those elbows." While maybe it was an odd thing to say, it was from the care of a friend. To this day after a shower you can bet I am putting lotion on my elbows.
Why do we neglect ourselves? We give so much to others, but in the end we have to take care of ourselves because no one else will, end of story. Yet, we often put it off. I am just as guilty as the next person. One of the best reads that addresses this is called, 'Burnt Toast' by Teri Hatcher. It speaks about how she would watch her Mom scrape off the burnt part of the toast instead of putting in a new slice of bread. This brilliant book goes into speak about how we deserve to eat good toast and we don't have to eat the burnt pieces.
Take time for you - whether it is just to paint your nails, go for a walk, a longer hot shower, or maybe that yummy little treat on the way to work or at lunch. One of my most favorite things to do is on a Sunday. Wake up leisurely, turn on npr to their fun morning shows, make waffles, and enjoy the Sunday paper with a cup of coffee then watch a few movies or tv. Now, due to current circumstance I have not been able to do that for quite some time. But, when that day does come, you can bet I will be taking full advantage of it.
I also enjoy going to a movie by myself. Endlessly I have met people who cannot wrap their head around the idea of attending a movie by themselves. But, I like it because with my theatre background I get lost in movies. Then after the movie is done I like to watch the credits all the way to the very end. Once that has finished I get up, throw away my containers and quietly walk to my vehicle lost in thought. The last movie I saw was "American Sniper", I walked to my vehicle in tears. This was an amazing movie and it was deeply touching and it breaks my heart what this incredible hero did for so many people. It made me recollect my appreciation for all those in the military, and made me miss those who I am friends with who have served. If I had gone with someone I would have been very self conscious about the emotion I was experiencing and not allowed myself to let my guard down.
Recently, I splurged and purchased some really nice lotion by Nivea. It is rich and creamy and I love what it will do for my skin. Applying it has made me realize how dry, thirsty and basically dehydrated my skin is and how it has been getting neglected.
What have you been neglecting? Take some time and pick up a bottle of wine, take a bubble bath, make an appointment at a spa or go get your nails done. Maybe you are less girly and would rather spend time on a gun range. Whatever will make you happy? Save up if you have to and go do it. Nurture yourself, and it will help sooth and feel your soul.
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