Ever come to a cross roads in life? Maybe life is giving you the option to choose a path. How do you go about evaluating which is right for you? Do you calculate the risks of each option? Take a few moments for a classic pro/con list?
There have been times I have come to my own crossroads in life. During this time I try to make the best decision that I can make for what suits the moment. Sometimes it has brought struggle, other times it has brought adventure or life lessons. Regardless the outcome, there is always the growth, character development which can come with the choices we make in life. Along the way we meet new people, maybe travel to new places and discover something within us we never knew was there, or suspected was there all along.
I am currently going through a phase of a duration of a cross road. Ever since I left my parents farm to obtain my Bachelors degree, I was ready to return to home, get back to the country. The draw for my soul to have open spaces, large fields, woods, wildlife, the peace of the country life. Yet, as I sought after employment, I continued to find the better paying jobs in the city. It was a job opportunity with the Show Place Arena which took me to Memphis, TN. From there it was the draw of a safer living environment which took me to Nashville, TN. When I have looked for other jobs in other towns, states, I have always found the better paying employment opportunities residing within larger cities. As I am pursuing my business and writing career, the anxiousness to get out in the peace, quiet and serenity of the country life is calling louder and louder. This inner voice has made me sit up and pay attention and completely re-evaluate where I am in life, how I am trying to get to where I want to be, and a big decision which has been waiting for a while.
Do I try to pursue a business and writing career from a small town and country environment?
Since I am in a position of having to work in an office while pursuing these goals, should I just go home? Find a job in an office during the day while I work on the business and writing at night?
I am doing that now, why not do it where I want to be.
That gives me the next question, am I ready? I love Nashville. I have worked very hard to make this area my home. The blessing of good friends flow and these amazing individuals are my family. I have made amazing connections in the photography world, and small connections in the fashion industry here. Is it time to give that all up and walk away from it? Even when I do go, I know my fingers will always dabble here in Nashville. There are too many good friends and people here. Plus, I love zipping around on the streets and roads just because I know my way around so well in most areas of this town.
While I re-evaluate I continue to struggle with where I want to be and how to make it happen. Over the course of the next year I will be setting myself up to get prepared for a big move. Maybe it will be Wisconsin, or maybe it will be somewhere else. Regardless, during this time I need to prepare my little ducks and get them in order. Then, in 12 months when I step back to see where life has gotten me, I will know hopefully what I need to do next.
I miss getting up and stepping outside to walk out to my chickens. Going back inside the house and making breakfast to get the day started. I miss looking out the window to look over the country side. Sleeping in my big bed, cooking in a kitchen, laying out all the items for making cookies on the kitchen table.
Missing these things has gotten me to a pathway where I am coming to realize this runway show I am doing is not as important to me as it once was. As I love photography, I have come to learn the editing process is my least favorite. Hopefully, that one detail is not enough to make me quit pursuing it. My heart longs for less stress, a more quiet life, and yet part of me enjoys the comforts I have come to get acquainted with by being near a city setting. Though while I was living in the country a year and a half ago, I made due quite well, and I loved it.
Here I am, one who is able to adapt to her surroundings, has become comfortable in big city living. Yet, I am torn to stay, go, continue to make deep sacrifices to make my dreams come true, to give up or to just move home. Is a life in the country waiting ahead for me, or do I need to make the steps happen to get things in motion for me?
I don't know the answers. I don't know exactly what it is I should do. For now, the plan is to back off from photography, continue to write as much as I can and see where this new job I have started can take me. I am hoping in two or three months I will be full time with the company. From there I want to get some savings built up, get my credit built up, get my truck fixed. Once my truck is running solid I want to go and visit some friends I have not seen in a while. Travel to see the ocean a couple times, maybe even the wild horses in North Carolina. Then start up the plan to relocate to Wisconsin.
I'm not sure what the future holds for me. I also do not know what will come along from today until a few months from now. Maybe something will change my wind direction and take me somewhere else, somewhere new? Maybe Chad will finally come visit me like he has said he would, or maybe he will fade away. Maybe my photography will pick up and I will book more sessions, possibly some even out of state?
Until these "maybe's" turn into something of substance, I have to deal with today. Today consists of stress and hope for the life I have wanted for so long to be at my fingertips.
Saturday, February 28, 2015
Friday, February 27, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 58...Not in the Cards
While volunteering with the Music City Youth Orchestra on Saturday the director had her grandson there. He was looking very adorable at 3 months old in the cutest and smallest little button up shirt I have ever seen for a baby.
Sunday my co-worker brought in her adorable baby. He is only seven months old and I was elated to see him. I am very glad as I have gotten older I have gained appreciation for babies and children. I believe they are a great gift and not everyone if fortunate to have them in their lives.
As my co-worker held this beautiful baby boy I reached up and he held onto my finger so tight. It was adorable. Before my co-worker left she let me hold him, and I was elated. I was even happier to see he gave me a big smile that said he accepted me and would let me hold him.
While spending time with these amazing and precious children it made me think of my very dear and best friend Kara who is about to have her first baby. It makes me very sad I have not been a part of her pregnancy and I don't know if I will be able to get to Wisconsin for when this little baby girl is born. I have already been requested to be present for her 1st birthday. This is something which needs to be a priority and I have over a year to make that happen.
As I think of these beautiful babies and the people who are blessed to have them it makes me analyze my life. I'm getting older and the option of children is quickly dissipating away. For the longest time I never wanted kids. Then the holidays come and I think of how wonderful it would be to share that special time of year with children. There are the moments when I so something which was taught or passed down to me that I would like to share with a child.
Yet, at this time in my life, I don't see it being in the cards. I try to make peace with it and remind myself it just may not be a part of the "big plan". No man in my life, and no indication there ever will be. It makes me wonder if I will be that professional business woman who lives her life alone. No husband to care for and no children to pass along information and life experiences.
If you are fortunate to have a child or children in your life, give thanks for them. Be grateful for the gift. I am certain as a parent you are exhausted, worn out, and haven't had a full nights sleep in years. Yet, family is the most important thing in the world. Nothing else matters, not Facebook, cell phones, it is about the life experiences and family time which is shared.
While I will continue to put on a brave face when around friends who are blessed with children. I cannot help but wonder why I am left out in the cold. What is my life lesson that I am made to wait to know if I will ever have a husband or a family of my own.
Until that passing day, whether in five years, ten years or on my death bed when I finally know whether or not it was in the cards, I try to make the best of my days and my life. I will always smile and maybe even depending on the moment in my life state I don't need or want kids. But, the reality is I have to continue to push and move forward, the time still ticks by if all I did was sit around and wonder. Part of me is like anyone else and wants what you want as well...that fancy America dream. Except mine doesn't have picket fences, but it does have a chicken coop, land with a country home and a career.
Maybe one day it will all come together and the entire package will be my life, instead of a desire in my heart.
Sunday my co-worker brought in her adorable baby. He is only seven months old and I was elated to see him. I am very glad as I have gotten older I have gained appreciation for babies and children. I believe they are a great gift and not everyone if fortunate to have them in their lives.
As my co-worker held this beautiful baby boy I reached up and he held onto my finger so tight. It was adorable. Before my co-worker left she let me hold him, and I was elated. I was even happier to see he gave me a big smile that said he accepted me and would let me hold him.
While spending time with these amazing and precious children it made me think of my very dear and best friend Kara who is about to have her first baby. It makes me very sad I have not been a part of her pregnancy and I don't know if I will be able to get to Wisconsin for when this little baby girl is born. I have already been requested to be present for her 1st birthday. This is something which needs to be a priority and I have over a year to make that happen.
As I think of these beautiful babies and the people who are blessed to have them it makes me analyze my life. I'm getting older and the option of children is quickly dissipating away. For the longest time I never wanted kids. Then the holidays come and I think of how wonderful it would be to share that special time of year with children. There are the moments when I so something which was taught or passed down to me that I would like to share with a child.
Yet, at this time in my life, I don't see it being in the cards. I try to make peace with it and remind myself it just may not be a part of the "big plan". No man in my life, and no indication there ever will be. It makes me wonder if I will be that professional business woman who lives her life alone. No husband to care for and no children to pass along information and life experiences.
If you are fortunate to have a child or children in your life, give thanks for them. Be grateful for the gift. I am certain as a parent you are exhausted, worn out, and haven't had a full nights sleep in years. Yet, family is the most important thing in the world. Nothing else matters, not Facebook, cell phones, it is about the life experiences and family time which is shared.
While I will continue to put on a brave face when around friends who are blessed with children. I cannot help but wonder why I am left out in the cold. What is my life lesson that I am made to wait to know if I will ever have a husband or a family of my own.
Until that passing day, whether in five years, ten years or on my death bed when I finally know whether or not it was in the cards, I try to make the best of my days and my life. I will always smile and maybe even depending on the moment in my life state I don't need or want kids. But, the reality is I have to continue to push and move forward, the time still ticks by if all I did was sit around and wonder. Part of me is like anyone else and wants what you want as well...that fancy America dream. Except mine doesn't have picket fences, but it does have a chicken coop, land with a country home and a career.
Maybe one day it will all come together and the entire package will be my life, instead of a desire in my heart.
Thursday, February 26, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 57...Surprise E-mail
The other day I received an e-mail which took me by surprise. It was from a guy who I know from high school. He was a year or two ahead of me and we were neighbors. We were always cordial to one another, but did not run in the same circles. This was an individual who was a known drug user and that was enough for me to keep my distance. I also did not pay a lot attention to boys as I was horse crazy and couldn't get enough spending time with my equine friend.
I lost contact with this individual and was surprised to see him on the front page of the local newspaper. This person had been struck by lightning and made the news. In the photo he was still wearing a tie dyed t-shirt just like he did in high school, and his hair was fuzzy and a little more expanded than usual. I never saw him and never thought about him again.
Fast forward to the age of Facebook, and through a mutual friend he added me and I hesitantly accepted. We never communicated and I forgot we were friends on Facebook.
Then this e-mail from him showed up...imagine my surprise when I read the following:
"You absolutely intrigue me...can I ask u on a date"?
Being surprised by this comment I told him I was flattered but I reside in Nashville, TN.
"LaCresha I have to say you are awesome. Anyway, I hope your night is well"
Still not sure what to think of all this, as he is not someone I would usually go out with. However, I am keeping my options open as I don't know where life would lead, and I don't know how he may have turned out as a person. I explained to him in my response that next time I am home we could get together and get a beer. I further stated I was trying to get home to do some research on a book I am working on.
"Rock on with your book bud. I guess we are miles apart. Sorry for the inconvenience. Seriously, you rock. I'd like it if you contact me when you get around. You have become a beautiful woman, just wanted to tell you that. Good luck with your book, btw. I can't congratulate you enough on how great you have become, please find me if you wish when you come around...I won't hold my breath."
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
I explained to him I do not, but was dating someone I was interested in at this time.
Our conversation then ended with, "I'll call you sometime. Stay cool, good lookin'".
I have always, always, always wanted to be considered beautiful. I am honored to receive such an e-mail and have this conversation with someone from my past. It was quite kind of him to speak up and say something. While I will more than likely look this person up when I finally get to go home. With so many miles apart, I cannot say he is someone I would be willing to date. Even if we didn't have 800 miles separating us, I still do not believe I would date him. As I am trying to remain open, one never knows where life may lead.
Until that day, I cannot deny how much I think about Chad. He consumes my thoughts and makes me want to strive for a more quiet life that I have wanted since I left the farm to pursue my degree and career. During this time I have been trying very hard to find ways to get back to the country. My heart is longing for it more and more, as much as I have come to love Nashville, the quiet country side calls. To have my own studio which I long to share with my amazing friend Ernie. The ability to travel with my photography and writing. Maybe have a quiet loft to write, edit photos, create, run my business and a beautiful kitchen where I can cook and bake. Most certainly, my chickens outside where I can visit them and check on them as often as I want. Even space where I can play my instruments and fill that void in my life once again.
The heart wants what the heart wants. A quiet country life with a booming writing and photography career with a loyal man who sees me as beautiful and treats me well.
Is that too much to ask....?
I lost contact with this individual and was surprised to see him on the front page of the local newspaper. This person had been struck by lightning and made the news. In the photo he was still wearing a tie dyed t-shirt just like he did in high school, and his hair was fuzzy and a little more expanded than usual. I never saw him and never thought about him again.
Fast forward to the age of Facebook, and through a mutual friend he added me and I hesitantly accepted. We never communicated and I forgot we were friends on Facebook.
Then this e-mail from him showed up...imagine my surprise when I read the following:
"You absolutely intrigue me...can I ask u on a date"?
Being surprised by this comment I told him I was flattered but I reside in Nashville, TN.
"LaCresha I have to say you are awesome. Anyway, I hope your night is well"
Still not sure what to think of all this, as he is not someone I would usually go out with. However, I am keeping my options open as I don't know where life would lead, and I don't know how he may have turned out as a person. I explained to him in my response that next time I am home we could get together and get a beer. I further stated I was trying to get home to do some research on a book I am working on.
"Rock on with your book bud. I guess we are miles apart. Sorry for the inconvenience. Seriously, you rock. I'd like it if you contact me when you get around. You have become a beautiful woman, just wanted to tell you that. Good luck with your book, btw. I can't congratulate you enough on how great you have become, please find me if you wish when you come around...I won't hold my breath."
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
I explained to him I do not, but was dating someone I was interested in at this time.
Our conversation then ended with, "I'll call you sometime. Stay cool, good lookin'".
I have always, always, always wanted to be considered beautiful. I am honored to receive such an e-mail and have this conversation with someone from my past. It was quite kind of him to speak up and say something. While I will more than likely look this person up when I finally get to go home. With so many miles apart, I cannot say he is someone I would be willing to date. Even if we didn't have 800 miles separating us, I still do not believe I would date him. As I am trying to remain open, one never knows where life may lead.
Until that day, I cannot deny how much I think about Chad. He consumes my thoughts and makes me want to strive for a more quiet life that I have wanted since I left the farm to pursue my degree and career. During this time I have been trying very hard to find ways to get back to the country. My heart is longing for it more and more, as much as I have come to love Nashville, the quiet country side calls. To have my own studio which I long to share with my amazing friend Ernie. The ability to travel with my photography and writing. Maybe have a quiet loft to write, edit photos, create, run my business and a beautiful kitchen where I can cook and bake. Most certainly, my chickens outside where I can visit them and check on them as often as I want. Even space where I can play my instruments and fill that void in my life once again.
The heart wants what the heart wants. A quiet country life with a booming writing and photography career with a loyal man who sees me as beautiful and treats me well.
Is that too much to ask....?
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 56...Attitude of Gratitude
What are you grateful and thankful for in your life? An "attitude of gratitude" does not mean that we turn a blind eye to the fact that nothing negative occurs. It only mean that we strive to be as positive and believe in the good which does exist in the Universe around us.
When you go to bed tonight, take some time and think about the good which resides within your life. Give thanks to God for those good things, and how the bad has shaped you. Life is not meant to be easy, but if we seek the good we will find it. Don't get distressed when things fall apart, don't quit, don't give up. Pressing onward with a positive outlook and soon it will become a habit.
When you go to bed tonight, take some time and think about the good which resides within your life. Give thanks to God for those good things, and how the bad has shaped you. Life is not meant to be easy, but if we seek the good we will find it. Don't get distressed when things fall apart, don't quit, don't give up. Pressing onward with a positive outlook and soon it will become a habit.
A fellow missionary while I was in Jamaica for Mission Jamaica
My time helping others helped me develop and grow my gratitude towards the simple things I have in my life.
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 55...Dream Big or Giving Up
If you ever listen or read anything by Joel Osteen, you have heard him say, "Dream so big it scares you". What is your dream? Does it make you nervous once in a while? Does it make you want to give up?
If the case is to dream so big it scares you, I am on the right track. As I pursue my hopes, dreams and goals I have fear of failing and having to one day, sit down and realize "I can't do it". The way I feel when I walk into a photo session verses an office is a huge difference for me. One is a dream, one just pays the bills as I pursue that dream.
There are also times I wonder if I have taken on too much. A fitness goal, a writing career I am embracing and getting a photography business up and running, along with a charity event. I have already cut back on quite a bit. Yet, it seems there is too much I am trying to do. Part of me wants to be able to do it all and yet to be a success I need to also be realistic.
While I have gotten to know a certain gentleman online recently, and reviewed the struggle I have endured, my priorities are being evaluated. My heart desires a country home, a more simple life with the opportunity to travel as I live my life living my dreams of a photographer and a writer. How much more should I endure? What is waiting ahead for me? What is God trying to tell me by this constant struggle? Is my character being developed further or am I being pushed into a change?
Interesting enough, this past weekend the doctor I work for made a couple comments to me about my photography and asked what I needed to do to get more booked/paid sessions. I won't deny I was surprised to hear this from her. It was reassuring to work for someone who is aware of my dreams and in her own way supportive to see me succeed.
While I contemplate my next few steps towards my future I push onward. Exhausted, fatigued, emotionally and mentally drained, hoping with each push forward I will find a change in the right direction. There is this draw inside me to have a home with some land in the country. The push to make myself successful continues so I can be in the position to have a simpler lifestyle. The dream to wake up to travel for my photography and have the time to write. Maybe even have a man in my life to wake up to and enjoy our life together. It is hard to say what waits ahead, and I cannot deny there are times I want to give up. Yet, the sadness I would experience every day for the rest of my life is strong enough to keep me trying.
What is your dream? What is your goal? What do you aspire to do in life? Why haven't you gone after it? If you are going after it, do you feel afraid? Is what you are trying to accomplish scare you? Even if you have the fear of failure or uncertainty I encourage you to go after it. The time will pass you by regardless, why not utilize that time to chase your dreams and goals. If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Don't be shy about reevaluating and trying again. Even Chef Gordon Ramsey has admitted that he failed at the first attempt to run a restaurant. He picked himself up, and tried again and now he has over 20 successful restaurants. Face the fear, it can be a healthy part of the process, but don't let it hold you back.
Go and chase that dream, seek that desire which resides in your heart. No one has ever said it will be easy, but the end result when you are living your dream, will be worth it.
If the case is to dream so big it scares you, I am on the right track. As I pursue my hopes, dreams and goals I have fear of failing and having to one day, sit down and realize "I can't do it". The way I feel when I walk into a photo session verses an office is a huge difference for me. One is a dream, one just pays the bills as I pursue that dream.
There are also times I wonder if I have taken on too much. A fitness goal, a writing career I am embracing and getting a photography business up and running, along with a charity event. I have already cut back on quite a bit. Yet, it seems there is too much I am trying to do. Part of me wants to be able to do it all and yet to be a success I need to also be realistic.
While I have gotten to know a certain gentleman online recently, and reviewed the struggle I have endured, my priorities are being evaluated. My heart desires a country home, a more simple life with the opportunity to travel as I live my life living my dreams of a photographer and a writer. How much more should I endure? What is waiting ahead for me? What is God trying to tell me by this constant struggle? Is my character being developed further or am I being pushed into a change?
Interesting enough, this past weekend the doctor I work for made a couple comments to me about my photography and asked what I needed to do to get more booked/paid sessions. I won't deny I was surprised to hear this from her. It was reassuring to work for someone who is aware of my dreams and in her own way supportive to see me succeed.
While I contemplate my next few steps towards my future I push onward. Exhausted, fatigued, emotionally and mentally drained, hoping with each push forward I will find a change in the right direction. There is this draw inside me to have a home with some land in the country. The push to make myself successful continues so I can be in the position to have a simpler lifestyle. The dream to wake up to travel for my photography and have the time to write. Maybe even have a man in my life to wake up to and enjoy our life together. It is hard to say what waits ahead, and I cannot deny there are times I want to give up. Yet, the sadness I would experience every day for the rest of my life is strong enough to keep me trying.
What is your dream? What is your goal? What do you aspire to do in life? Why haven't you gone after it? If you are going after it, do you feel afraid? Is what you are trying to accomplish scare you? Even if you have the fear of failure or uncertainty I encourage you to go after it. The time will pass you by regardless, why not utilize that time to chase your dreams and goals. If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Don't be shy about reevaluating and trying again. Even Chef Gordon Ramsey has admitted that he failed at the first attempt to run a restaurant. He picked himself up, and tried again and now he has over 20 successful restaurants. Face the fear, it can be a healthy part of the process, but don't let it hold you back.
Go and chase that dream, seek that desire which resides in your heart. No one has ever said it will be easy, but the end result when you are living your dream, will be worth it.
Monday, February 23, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 54...Courtesy
Have you ever been forced to be around someone who lacks boundaries and the ability to be courteous?
Unfortunately, I have had my share of these people in my life. Each passing day I hope to be able to lessen the amount of people like that in my life while I pursue my dreams and goals. There is a small bit of hope, while I know there will still be those "bad apples" in each bunch, I won't have to deal with them every single day for months or years.
As I am not one who is willing to live with my parents while I pursue my goals, I work for a doctor as a Secretary by day. This individual has a lot of issues and pushes the boundaries with her lack of respect on a daily basis. One never knows what to expect when they open the back door to the office. Often it is a confrontation of something which she messed up but has found a way to blame someone else.
Understand personal boundaries and displaying the respect which goes with it is a huge thing in life. It is quite frustrating to deal with someone who lacks the ability to respect boundaries. It has taken me a long time to put my foot down and set boundaries in my life. During that process I have found the strength to use the words "that is my boundary". Yet, it has helped for me to establish the ground rules for my expectations from others in life. In return, I treat people the way I desire to be treated.
Displaying courtesy towards other speaks loudly. It doesn't take long to see the difference around you when you display courtesy. A little kindness goes a long way.
I don't know about you, but I appreciate being treated well and with kindness. In my life and the things I have endeavored, kindness has not always been front and center. Knowing I never want to be treated poorly again, I have taken that life experience and utilize it in a positive manner. That time in my life I use to try and display how people deserve to be treated, no matter what, and that is with patience and kindness. Maybe that lady at the check out counter is not friendly, but walk a mile in her shoes before you judge them. You don't know what is happening in their life. You don't need to know, what I recommend to you, is take a moment to smile and display some kindness. The pay off may not be immediate, but I promise you, what comes around goes around. You will see a change if you are willing to try and have patience with the process.
Unfortunately, I have had my share of these people in my life. Each passing day I hope to be able to lessen the amount of people like that in my life while I pursue my dreams and goals. There is a small bit of hope, while I know there will still be those "bad apples" in each bunch, I won't have to deal with them every single day for months or years.
As I am not one who is willing to live with my parents while I pursue my goals, I work for a doctor as a Secretary by day. This individual has a lot of issues and pushes the boundaries with her lack of respect on a daily basis. One never knows what to expect when they open the back door to the office. Often it is a confrontation of something which she messed up but has found a way to blame someone else.
Understand personal boundaries and displaying the respect which goes with it is a huge thing in life. It is quite frustrating to deal with someone who lacks the ability to respect boundaries. It has taken me a long time to put my foot down and set boundaries in my life. During that process I have found the strength to use the words "that is my boundary". Yet, it has helped for me to establish the ground rules for my expectations from others in life. In return, I treat people the way I desire to be treated.
Displaying courtesy towards other speaks loudly. It doesn't take long to see the difference around you when you display courtesy. A little kindness goes a long way.
I don't know about you, but I appreciate being treated well and with kindness. In my life and the things I have endeavored, kindness has not always been front and center. Knowing I never want to be treated poorly again, I have taken that life experience and utilize it in a positive manner. That time in my life I use to try and display how people deserve to be treated, no matter what, and that is with patience and kindness. Maybe that lady at the check out counter is not friendly, but walk a mile in her shoes before you judge them. You don't know what is happening in their life. You don't need to know, what I recommend to you, is take a moment to smile and display some kindness. The pay off may not be immediate, but I promise you, what comes around goes around. You will see a change if you are willing to try and have patience with the process.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 53...Chivalry
Chivalry is not dead. I am so glad to be able to say that with truth. This very kind man I have been speaking to online has voiced to me he is one to open doors, buy flowers, take a lady out and treat her well. While stepping into a Target store the other day I approached the door at the same time he stopped, extended his hand and said, "Where I come from, ladies are first"
Kind gentlemen still exist. I love it.
According to Merriam-Webster
- the system of values (such as loyalty and honor) that knights in the Middle Ages were expected to follow
Kind gentlemen still exist. I love it.
According to Merriam-Webster
- the system of values (such as loyalty and honor) that knights in the Middle Ages were expected to follow
- an honorable and polite way of behaving especially toward women
While many men have gotten away with treating women with a lack of respect and appreciation, that is not every man out there. I have come to truly appreciate being called, "ma'am", I love the level of respect which is behind it. There is something when it comes from a man with a sweet southern drawl that gets to my heart.
What I will always and forever appreciate it when a door is opened for me. I absolutely love when a man takes a couple moments from his day to hold a door for a lady. I will always sincerely express my gratitude with a "thank you".
There are certain things a man can do to really make him stand out. The time and effort to be chivalrous towards others. It may be age old, however, it is timeless. The display of consideration and respect really shows what a person is like at their core. I hope women out there will take two seconds to express their appreciation to someone who shows a little chivalry towards them. We need to return the respect which is being shown to us. Sure, we can open the door ourselves, let's not allow our own stubbornness to forget to be courteous in return. This respect which is being shown to us, needs to be appreciated. Don't ruin it for others if you do not enjoy it. Be grateful, a little gratitude can go a long way.
Saturday, February 21, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 52...Youth Orchestra
There are two organizations I volunteer with my photography. About two years ago I finally had to make a decision and back off from all my volunteer work. It is amazing how many people will be glad to invite you in to volunteer, and often it goes unappreciated. Where I have been a part of many wonderful events with my photography, I had to narrow down my interests for the sake of my sanity and time.
One of the organizations I volunteer with on a regular basis is the Music City Youth Orchestra. This is a youth orchestra which supports string players here in Middle-TN and beyond. It is a fun group and I love the people involved. I get to participate in a very exciting organization which supports orchestral and string music and feeds the passion of music in young players.
I was given the opportunity to photograph their rehearsals and various events. I love photographing live events, and musicians. It really feeds my spirit to be a part of such a fantastic group of young players.
What do you do to participate in your community? It is all about giving back and helping one another. What is your gift or talent? If you do not know what that may be, what are you interests? Go out and find a group who can use your help. Be careful not to get weighed down and take on too much which will effect your personal life. But, try to find something that interests you and volunteer. You may find it is very rewarding. It can also give you the opportunity to meet new people and develop new friendships and relationships.
I encourage you, if you are not currently active with a group, to go and find one. See what opportunities they have available and go help and make a difference in the community where you reside.
One of the organizations I volunteer with on a regular basis is the Music City Youth Orchestra. This is a youth orchestra which supports string players here in Middle-TN and beyond. It is a fun group and I love the people involved. I get to participate in a very exciting organization which supports orchestral and string music and feeds the passion of music in young players.
I was given the opportunity to photograph their rehearsals and various events. I love photographing live events, and musicians. It really feeds my spirit to be a part of such a fantastic group of young players.
What do you do to participate in your community? It is all about giving back and helping one another. What is your gift or talent? If you do not know what that may be, what are you interests? Go out and find a group who can use your help. Be careful not to get weighed down and take on too much which will effect your personal life. But, try to find something that interests you and volunteer. You may find it is very rewarding. It can also give you the opportunity to meet new people and develop new friendships and relationships.
I encourage you, if you are not currently active with a group, to go and find one. See what opportunities they have available and go help and make a difference in the community where you reside.
Friday, February 20, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 51...Opportunity Knocks
Today I was offered the job with a medical company. I was sent a link requesting for me to fill out information to officially apply for the position. It is to my understanding that this position is mine. This position will be on Fridays and Saturdays. I was reassured if I needed a Saturday off, there would be coverage provided without any problems. That was all I needed for reassurance and I accepted the job.
This week seems to be a time for opportunity for me. Earlier this week I contacted my cousin who hauls livestock for a living about riding with him and interviewing him for a book. I was elated when my offer was accepted and I am now in the process of preparing arrangements to go to Wisconsin for a couple weeks here and there in the upcoming year. As I would love to take off for a month and ride with him for four straight weeks, that is not a feasible option. Therefore, I am going to break it up in two week increments.
Another opportunity came a knocking via a model/talent agency here in Nashville. This agency wants to be a part of my runway charity event. Even bigger deal than that, they want to tie in this amazing group called "The Glam Squad" which is right in alignment with my goals with this organization and professional goals. We are having a conference call on Sunday and I am looking forward to the end results.
While I still sit and wonder what is to come, I am hoping with these doors of opportunity opening, it is a sign I am on the right track.
What opportunities have been knocking at your door? Will you answer that call or pass? Life is too short, it is not a dress rehearsal. Don't let it pass you by, get up and away the sidelines and get into the game and play!
This week seems to be a time for opportunity for me. Earlier this week I contacted my cousin who hauls livestock for a living about riding with him and interviewing him for a book. I was elated when my offer was accepted and I am now in the process of preparing arrangements to go to Wisconsin for a couple weeks here and there in the upcoming year. As I would love to take off for a month and ride with him for four straight weeks, that is not a feasible option. Therefore, I am going to break it up in two week increments.
Another opportunity came a knocking via a model/talent agency here in Nashville. This agency wants to be a part of my runway charity event. Even bigger deal than that, they want to tie in this amazing group called "The Glam Squad" which is right in alignment with my goals with this organization and professional goals. We are having a conference call on Sunday and I am looking forward to the end results.
While I still sit and wonder what is to come, I am hoping with these doors of opportunity opening, it is a sign I am on the right track.
What opportunities have been knocking at your door? Will you answer that call or pass? Life is too short, it is not a dress rehearsal. Don't let it pass you by, get up and away the sidelines and get into the game and play!
Don't let life pass you by...break free from the bars which hold you back, and go after your hearts desire!
Thursday, February 19, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 50...Opportunity
While I am pursuing my dreams and goals to run my own photography business, and writing career, I work by day as a secretary. I do not like admitting to this, and honestly, it makes me sad. However, I am not one to sit by and not pay my bills, so I work. I work part time for a doctor in Nashville, TN. There are days I really hate this job. There are days which are tolerable. I have stayed as long as I have because of a woman I work with, Theresa. She is superbly awesome. I pretty much love everything about her.
During my time working for this doctor, there have been times when she shuts the office down. When this happens, I do not get paid. As a part time employee, this takes a pretty significant toll. Before and after I go into work I work on my business. I am exhausted, and recently been debating if all this work will ever pay off.
Recently, a new employment opportunity has come along. There has been a rep who has been coming into the office since before I began working there. In October this individual began trying to hire me. Considering I am part time, and basically a "struggling artists/starving artist" I knew I had to pay attention. My truck needs to be fixed, and I am tired of the 'struggle' for my art. I am at a crossroads in my life and I have a lot on my plate which lies before me with big decisions to make. Taking on another medical job is not my ideal, however, if it will help me get ahead, then maybe it is something I need to consider.
Today at work, I got a visit from this rep, and he basically offered me a position which is an hour and a half away. The pay is what I am accustom to making for a wage. While I am concerned with how my truck will handle the commute, and how it will affect my goals, I think I need to take the job.
It is with a heavy heart...
I discussed it over with Chad, and he thinks it could be worth while. I think this individual has a good sense of judgment and I believe he is probably right. I am to send my resume to the rep tonight...then wait and find out what happens.
Sometimes an opportunity comes along and we have to take the time to mull over our decisions when opportunity comes knocking. I don't know where my life is going, and I'm heartbroken over it. I am also frustrated. I often wonder if I will every fully recover from being completely knocked down as I feel I am still slipping and sliding to gain my footing. Not something I am proud of, but I haven't given up just yet. While part of me is exhausted, feels defeated, and I wonder if I have it in me to push onward, to "make it happen". I want to believe I can...I really, really do.
Now, this job opportunity has come along. I will accept the position if it is offered to me, and hope for the best.
I don't know what is yet to come. While I like to let the wind, Universe and God guide me...I hope I am making the right decision to make my life better. Along the way, I hope I still have it within me to accomplish my goals.
During my time working for this doctor, there have been times when she shuts the office down. When this happens, I do not get paid. As a part time employee, this takes a pretty significant toll. Before and after I go into work I work on my business. I am exhausted, and recently been debating if all this work will ever pay off.
Recently, a new employment opportunity has come along. There has been a rep who has been coming into the office since before I began working there. In October this individual began trying to hire me. Considering I am part time, and basically a "struggling artists/starving artist" I knew I had to pay attention. My truck needs to be fixed, and I am tired of the 'struggle' for my art. I am at a crossroads in my life and I have a lot on my plate which lies before me with big decisions to make. Taking on another medical job is not my ideal, however, if it will help me get ahead, then maybe it is something I need to consider.
Today at work, I got a visit from this rep, and he basically offered me a position which is an hour and a half away. The pay is what I am accustom to making for a wage. While I am concerned with how my truck will handle the commute, and how it will affect my goals, I think I need to take the job.
It is with a heavy heart...
I discussed it over with Chad, and he thinks it could be worth while. I think this individual has a good sense of judgment and I believe he is probably right. I am to send my resume to the rep tonight...then wait and find out what happens.
Sometimes an opportunity comes along and we have to take the time to mull over our decisions when opportunity comes knocking. I don't know where my life is going, and I'm heartbroken over it. I am also frustrated. I often wonder if I will every fully recover from being completely knocked down as I feel I am still slipping and sliding to gain my footing. Not something I am proud of, but I haven't given up just yet. While part of me is exhausted, feels defeated, and I wonder if I have it in me to push onward, to "make it happen". I want to believe I can...I really, really do.
Now, this job opportunity has come along. I will accept the position if it is offered to me, and hope for the best.
I don't know what is yet to come. While I like to let the wind, Universe and God guide me...I hope I am making the right decision to make my life better. Along the way, I hope I still have it within me to accomplish my goals.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 49...Endless Adventure
An idea for a book came to me last week. Over and over I am told, write about what you know, and I find once I can implement something I know into my writing the process becomes incredibly fun and adds a challenge and excitement to my writing.
The idea for a story seems to come to me on occasion, and sometimes it resonates so strongly that it finally has to be written down. Currently there are two ideas I have that are about truck drivers. One is a romantic story and another a non-fiction piece that will hopefully develop into a series of short stories. My cousin has hauled livestock as his career for as long as I have been around. He has this great dry sense of humor and a great way to tell a story. I want to go and explore his world and share his endless years on the road hitched to a trailer.
Life for me is an endless adventure. There are times this adventure wears me out, makes me sad and brings me great joy. This life that I have been living I am hoping will server me with endless potential stories, articles and maybe even books.
What is your adventure? What has life brought to you? How have you been taking advantage of it?
Don't sit still and watch life pass you by. Get up and dance the dance, the music playing is beautiful, go and enjoy it!
The idea for a story seems to come to me on occasion, and sometimes it resonates so strongly that it finally has to be written down. Currently there are two ideas I have that are about truck drivers. One is a romantic story and another a non-fiction piece that will hopefully develop into a series of short stories. My cousin has hauled livestock as his career for as long as I have been around. He has this great dry sense of humor and a great way to tell a story. I want to go and explore his world and share his endless years on the road hitched to a trailer.
Life for me is an endless adventure. There are times this adventure wears me out, makes me sad and brings me great joy. This life that I have been living I am hoping will server me with endless potential stories, articles and maybe even books.
What is your adventure? What has life brought to you? How have you been taking advantage of it?
Don't sit still and watch life pass you by. Get up and dance the dance, the music playing is beautiful, go and enjoy it!
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 48...Self Discovery
Have you ever asked someone what they thought of you? Maybe someone has come forward and told you on their own?
It is a priceless moment.
I have been greatly blessed with friends who have come to me from time to time and shared with me their thoughts about me. Sometimes it has not been a pleasant moment, however, I am still grateful for that time. It has helped me develop into a better person. Someone I am incredibly grateful for is my brother. This loving and amazing blessing in my life has always kept me in check. When I am messing up he is the first one to let me know. If I am making life decisions and choices which he feels is not right for me, he will speak up. Majority of the time, if not all the time, he has been right. What an incredible blessing to have someone who cares about me so much that he would speak up to keep me straight. I can always count on him.
Recently, I asked someone who I am wanting to be romantically involved with what he thought of me. There was joy in my heart when he responded:
"Interesting, calm, cool, collective, understanding. Seems like you're willing to try new things, so that's awesome in my book".
It made me smile.
Recently I have written on what my friend Miss E said to me in a text message. Thankfully, I went through a lot of growing pains when I was younger. It has been enlightening through the journey of my life. I will be the first one to admit I am far from perfect and have little desire to ever be "perfect". It is the imperfections which help me be who I am, every day I try to be kind to others while having fun along the way.
How have your growing pains shaped you? Have you gone through a difficult time which helped you develop your character, become a better person? Maybe you are going through your growing pains right now?
There are times in my life I have to step back and wonder, is God shaping my character, or trying to tell me that a change is necessary? What is happening in your life which may be shaping your character or encouraging you to make a change?
Don't fight it, embrace it, you may be very surprised where it may lead you or who you may become down the road.
It is a priceless moment.
I have been greatly blessed with friends who have come to me from time to time and shared with me their thoughts about me. Sometimes it has not been a pleasant moment, however, I am still grateful for that time. It has helped me develop into a better person. Someone I am incredibly grateful for is my brother. This loving and amazing blessing in my life has always kept me in check. When I am messing up he is the first one to let me know. If I am making life decisions and choices which he feels is not right for me, he will speak up. Majority of the time, if not all the time, he has been right. What an incredible blessing to have someone who cares about me so much that he would speak up to keep me straight. I can always count on him.
Recently, I asked someone who I am wanting to be romantically involved with what he thought of me. There was joy in my heart when he responded:
"Interesting, calm, cool, collective, understanding. Seems like you're willing to try new things, so that's awesome in my book".
It made me smile.
Recently I have written on what my friend Miss E said to me in a text message. Thankfully, I went through a lot of growing pains when I was younger. It has been enlightening through the journey of my life. I will be the first one to admit I am far from perfect and have little desire to ever be "perfect". It is the imperfections which help me be who I am, every day I try to be kind to others while having fun along the way.
How have your growing pains shaped you? Have you gone through a difficult time which helped you develop your character, become a better person? Maybe you are going through your growing pains right now?
There are times in my life I have to step back and wonder, is God shaping my character, or trying to tell me that a change is necessary? What is happening in your life which may be shaping your character or encouraging you to make a change?
Don't fight it, embrace it, you may be very surprised where it may lead you or who you may become down the road.
Monday, February 16, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 47...Technology
One thing we all know about technology is that is and always will be changing. There are continuous developments in computers, programs, cell phones! Once upon a time I didn't mind getting a new cell phone. Now, I hate it. I hate the process, transferring information and learning a new device. Where I once picked on my Mom when she would get upset over figuring out a new cell phone, now I am right there with her trying to fight learning a new phone.
I once had a Blackberry Curve, I fought moving from a flip phone Razr to this phone. Then I learned how much fun it was and loved the tactile to the keypad. I made that phone last over four years. The fight finally had to end my relationship with my little purple phone. I thought I would slowly transition to the world of touch screen by getting another blackberry with a touchscreen and the tactile keypad I love.
Well...let the games begin. The phone first did not some of the things the reviews stated it would do. There were apps which would not load due to being incompatible. Where I was enjoying the phone, it continued to give me issues and in the past three weeks it has begun to not send e-mails. During this time I found out Chad wanted to chat on KIK, which my phone would not load. My last straw hit when I was at a restaurant with friends for a birthday party and even the waiter mocked me due to my phone "who still has a blackberry?"
Point taken.
Thankfully, my friend Miss E was wanting to get rid of her phone as she replaced it with a similar but smaller model. She is selling me this phone and I am moving up in the world of technology. As I have a learning curve to it, and it has all these apps, bells, whistles and I wonder how will I ever get any work done playing with it.
As a photographer and a writer I spend a lot of time on computers, phones, iPads, lighting gear and other methods of technical devices. As knowledgeable as I may be with many of these items, there is lack in my education. This time of transition from one phone of old technology to a new phone of touch screen and current technology it has made me face a realization. I cannot continue to hide behind the lack of knowledge which has been barely getting me by. It is time for me to step up my game if I want to be on top of the industry of photography. This is something which I have been putting off due to the amount of time I know it will take for me to learn. However, I am not at a place where I can continue to delay this learning process.
Ahhhh...technology...something which I cannot live without, and can no longer deny myself from advancing my place in the world of technology. While I may not need to be the most technically advance person out there, I will leave that for those fabulous geek friends of mine! It is time I remove myself from the sidelines of the world of technology. No more watching it pass me by, time to dive in and see what I can learn and figure out.
I once had a Blackberry Curve, I fought moving from a flip phone Razr to this phone. Then I learned how much fun it was and loved the tactile to the keypad. I made that phone last over four years. The fight finally had to end my relationship with my little purple phone. I thought I would slowly transition to the world of touch screen by getting another blackberry with a touchscreen and the tactile keypad I love.
Well...let the games begin. The phone first did not some of the things the reviews stated it would do. There were apps which would not load due to being incompatible. Where I was enjoying the phone, it continued to give me issues and in the past three weeks it has begun to not send e-mails. During this time I found out Chad wanted to chat on KIK, which my phone would not load. My last straw hit when I was at a restaurant with friends for a birthday party and even the waiter mocked me due to my phone "who still has a blackberry?"
Point taken.
Thankfully, my friend Miss E was wanting to get rid of her phone as she replaced it with a similar but smaller model. She is selling me this phone and I am moving up in the world of technology. As I have a learning curve to it, and it has all these apps, bells, whistles and I wonder how will I ever get any work done playing with it.
As a photographer and a writer I spend a lot of time on computers, phones, iPads, lighting gear and other methods of technical devices. As knowledgeable as I may be with many of these items, there is lack in my education. This time of transition from one phone of old technology to a new phone of touch screen and current technology it has made me face a realization. I cannot continue to hide behind the lack of knowledge which has been barely getting me by. It is time for me to step up my game if I want to be on top of the industry of photography. This is something which I have been putting off due to the amount of time I know it will take for me to learn. However, I am not at a place where I can continue to delay this learning process.
Ahhhh...technology...something which I cannot live without, and can no longer deny myself from advancing my place in the world of technology. While I may not need to be the most technically advance person out there, I will leave that for those fabulous geek friends of mine! It is time I remove myself from the sidelines of the world of technology. No more watching it pass me by, time to dive in and see what I can learn and figure out.
Sunday, February 15, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 46...Bridal Runway & Mexican Fun!
I woke up to me being lazy. I do believe I have taken on too much as I am feeling overwhelmed and stressed. I am in neck deep and it is time for me to fight to work my way up. Yet, I am worn out from the struggle I have endured for the past 18 months. I continue to believe that things will get better, things will change, unfortunately, I am tired, physically and mentally. There is a belief within me that stands strong feeling I can do it all...the fitness challenge, raise up to the challenge of moving my photography business forward, and get my writing career started.
It is a lot. Plus, add a charity event on top of it all and I just want to to curl up into a ball and hide.
This all has began to come more clear to me over the past two weeks. However, this morning, I woke up at 7:15am with the expectation to get work done, and I turned the alarm off and went back to bed. It didn't help that when I woke up I had arranged the pillow next to me in my sleep to where it was squooshed up. In the position I woke and maybe a dream I had woken from I thought I had my head on Chad's chest. All I wanted to do was get lost in that thought and for the next couple of hours I drifted in and out of consciousness thinking about him.
Finally, I decided I needed to get myself up and out of bed. At this same time Miss E texted me reminding me about the bridal show today. I began to get ready, feed the cats (I am house sitting again) and head out to feed the chickies. She sends me a follow up text asking me to photograph the runway show. I run and grab my camera frustrated that I don't have the lens I need to do my job as a photographer. Miss E tells me to use my wide angle 55mm. While I am waiting for her to come down from her apartment I change lenses. Once at the bridal show, even though we are there for the models, we had a free pass and decided to check out the show. At this point and time Miss E decides I will play "bride". This is the second bridal show I have attended with a friend who made me play the "bride" role. Which is humorous to me as I have been in the "always a bridesmaid, never a bride" position in life.
We get our share of cake and catering samples, get signed up for a couple of things and head to the room where the fashion show will take place. We get front row seats and save spots for people from the agency. Once the show starts I had already taken test shots and everything looked good. Then during the models walking I glance down and realize my lens is not focusing. At this point I quietly said, "you've got to be fucking kidding me" and quickly reached down to change lenses. The runway show ended and I headed backstage to get photos of the models in their gowns. Back out front Miss E was reviewing the video she took during the show. She laughs at me and said because of me she would have to edit the video. I asked what she was talking about and she played the video and clear as can be my voice was heard. I told her I did not know she was taking video.
The next round on the runway I used a different lens and got better results. They were still coming out soft instead of tack sharp, but at least they were not blurry. Once the show was over I darted backstage and did another row of shots with the models.
As I was packing up my gear and getting things picked up, Miss E comments she was hungry. We discuss where we can go to grab some food and our new favorite Mexican restaurant comes up. Our only hesitation was that we had been there yesterday. It wasn't enough to keep us away and we headed that way to the Mexican place on 4th Avenue in downtown Nashville.
Our favorite waiter, Francisco was working. He didn't see us come in so I grabbed three menus, silverware and lead Miss E to our favorite table. Our meal was filled with laughter, friendly and perverted banter and endless fun. At one point I began to take a selfie with my pretty margarita drink and Sherry tries to get in on it. I wasn't having much luck so I handed the phone over to Miss E. Sherry and I turned our side of the table into a photo booth. At some point Miss E began to video tape, you see Sherry and I setting ourselves up to be photographed, pulling in props and being silly. Miss E was laughing so hard the phone was shaking the entire time. She finally was trying to gain her composure during a shot where Sherry and I are trying to pose silly with our margarita glasses. You can hear Miss E let out a slow breath, which at that point and time I lose it and spit my drink across the table. This only lead into complete hysterics, Sherry is laughing so hard she is crying, the phone is shaking from Miss E laughing and I can hardly breathe.
This is a video and a weekend which will be cherished for a very long time. I am incredibly thankful to be here in Nashville. I don't know how long my time will be here. I do know I will always have a presence here as I have developed extremely good relationships with friends, photographers, and this community. It has become a home to me. As I try to remain open to opportunity and things which may come, I wonder where my life will lead. Although I don't get too caught up into it, I give thanks to days like today, when the love and laughter flow so heavily, that joy over comes and makes the worry and stress melt away.
Laughter is the best medicine. It is all the more sweet when enjoyed by friends.
I am thankful. I am blessed.
It is a lot. Plus, add a charity event on top of it all and I just want to to curl up into a ball and hide.
This all has began to come more clear to me over the past two weeks. However, this morning, I woke up at 7:15am with the expectation to get work done, and I turned the alarm off and went back to bed. It didn't help that when I woke up I had arranged the pillow next to me in my sleep to where it was squooshed up. In the position I woke and maybe a dream I had woken from I thought I had my head on Chad's chest. All I wanted to do was get lost in that thought and for the next couple of hours I drifted in and out of consciousness thinking about him.
Finally, I decided I needed to get myself up and out of bed. At this same time Miss E texted me reminding me about the bridal show today. I began to get ready, feed the cats (I am house sitting again) and head out to feed the chickies. She sends me a follow up text asking me to photograph the runway show. I run and grab my camera frustrated that I don't have the lens I need to do my job as a photographer. Miss E tells me to use my wide angle 55mm. While I am waiting for her to come down from her apartment I change lenses. Once at the bridal show, even though we are there for the models, we had a free pass and decided to check out the show. At this point and time Miss E decides I will play "bride". This is the second bridal show I have attended with a friend who made me play the "bride" role. Which is humorous to me as I have been in the "always a bridesmaid, never a bride" position in life.
We get our share of cake and catering samples, get signed up for a couple of things and head to the room where the fashion show will take place. We get front row seats and save spots for people from the agency. Once the show starts I had already taken test shots and everything looked good. Then during the models walking I glance down and realize my lens is not focusing. At this point I quietly said, "you've got to be fucking kidding me" and quickly reached down to change lenses. The runway show ended and I headed backstage to get photos of the models in their gowns. Back out front Miss E was reviewing the video she took during the show. She laughs at me and said because of me she would have to edit the video. I asked what she was talking about and she played the video and clear as can be my voice was heard. I told her I did not know she was taking video.
The next round on the runway I used a different lens and got better results. They were still coming out soft instead of tack sharp, but at least they were not blurry. Once the show was over I darted backstage and did another row of shots with the models.
As I was packing up my gear and getting things picked up, Miss E comments she was hungry. We discuss where we can go to grab some food and our new favorite Mexican restaurant comes up. Our only hesitation was that we had been there yesterday. It wasn't enough to keep us away and we headed that way to the Mexican place on 4th Avenue in downtown Nashville.
Our favorite waiter, Francisco was working. He didn't see us come in so I grabbed three menus, silverware and lead Miss E to our favorite table. Our meal was filled with laughter, friendly and perverted banter and endless fun. At one point I began to take a selfie with my pretty margarita drink and Sherry tries to get in on it. I wasn't having much luck so I handed the phone over to Miss E. Sherry and I turned our side of the table into a photo booth. At some point Miss E began to video tape, you see Sherry and I setting ourselves up to be photographed, pulling in props and being silly. Miss E was laughing so hard the phone was shaking the entire time. She finally was trying to gain her composure during a shot where Sherry and I are trying to pose silly with our margarita glasses. You can hear Miss E let out a slow breath, which at that point and time I lose it and spit my drink across the table. This only lead into complete hysterics, Sherry is laughing so hard she is crying, the phone is shaking from Miss E laughing and I can hardly breathe.
This is a video and a weekend which will be cherished for a very long time. I am incredibly thankful to be here in Nashville. I don't know how long my time will be here. I do know I will always have a presence here as I have developed extremely good relationships with friends, photographers, and this community. It has become a home to me. As I try to remain open to opportunity and things which may come, I wonder where my life will lead. Although I don't get too caught up into it, I give thanks to days like today, when the love and laughter flow so heavily, that joy over comes and makes the worry and stress melt away.
Laughter is the best medicine. It is all the more sweet when enjoyed by friends.
I am thankful. I am blessed.
Saturday, February 14, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 45...Gypsy Cowgirl
There is a gypsy which resides within me. She loves to get up and follow the wind and chase the sun. While I did not like my work while at HCA the quarterly bonuses which I would receive would allow me to afford to pack a bag and hit the road. It was not uncommon for me to take on the coast and sit by the ocean for hours. Maybe drive out of town on a Friday to East Tennessee to stay with a friend in Bristol or find various places to go hiking.
Life has made a few changes and those trips do not happen as often as they once did, and my gypsy spirit is feeling an ache to travel. I have been struggling with this ache and it is really affecting a lot of what I do. I have noticed a lack of interest to push myself towards the goals my heart desires. A part of me really longs to hit the highway and just take off. It has been a long time since I have gone out and explored. While I love caving and getting out and checking out the world underground, hit the occasional hiking trail, my gypsy spirit is wanting so much more.
Kenny Chesney has a song that has been getting played on the radio called, "Wild Child". This song resonated to my heart of my soul and spirit so deeply that I cried listening to the lyrics. "Got a spirit that can't be tamed. She's a calico pony on an open plain...a rebel soul and a whole lot of gypsy, wild style, she can't be tied down, but for a while...be falling free and so alive...she drives me...Wild Child..."
Part of me needs to travel, part of me needs to get away and escape. I think if a truck driver came along and offered for me to get into his rig and take off...I would leave with him. I am sick of my living arrangements and tired of my job. A change needs to take place or I am going to make a change take place. The unknown has been wearing me out, the constant struggle I've been facing is wearing me thin. It brings a new level of concern and fear within me. I don't want to give up and I most certainly do not want to fail. I'm at a cross roads. Part of me wants to get to the level of success where I hope things can slow down and be more simple. Or do I take the steps to simplify now. The secondary one makes me extremely disappointed in myself to stop trying after all the time, effort and money I have already put into my dreams and goals.
Until I can find a that place in life to make the decision of where I am meant to go, I push onward. Every passing day I hope to find a way to take off and run away. Ideally I would like to run away for a month so I could fully decompress. Unfortunately that would not be something I could do at this time, but if I could get away for a week would be a good start for me.
I hope that this path I am on begins to make sense to me and show me what is waiting ahead. This journey has been long and far from over, but hopefully it will start showing me the way.
Life has made a few changes and those trips do not happen as often as they once did, and my gypsy spirit is feeling an ache to travel. I have been struggling with this ache and it is really affecting a lot of what I do. I have noticed a lack of interest to push myself towards the goals my heart desires. A part of me really longs to hit the highway and just take off. It has been a long time since I have gone out and explored. While I love caving and getting out and checking out the world underground, hit the occasional hiking trail, my gypsy spirit is wanting so much more.
Kenny Chesney has a song that has been getting played on the radio called, "Wild Child". This song resonated to my heart of my soul and spirit so deeply that I cried listening to the lyrics. "Got a spirit that can't be tamed. She's a calico pony on an open plain...a rebel soul and a whole lot of gypsy, wild style, she can't be tied down, but for a while...be falling free and so alive...she drives me...Wild Child..."
Part of me needs to travel, part of me needs to get away and escape. I think if a truck driver came along and offered for me to get into his rig and take off...I would leave with him. I am sick of my living arrangements and tired of my job. A change needs to take place or I am going to make a change take place. The unknown has been wearing me out, the constant struggle I've been facing is wearing me thin. It brings a new level of concern and fear within me. I don't want to give up and I most certainly do not want to fail. I'm at a cross roads. Part of me wants to get to the level of success where I hope things can slow down and be more simple. Or do I take the steps to simplify now. The secondary one makes me extremely disappointed in myself to stop trying after all the time, effort and money I have already put into my dreams and goals.
Until I can find a that place in life to make the decision of where I am meant to go, I push onward. Every passing day I hope to find a way to take off and run away. Ideally I would like to run away for a month so I could fully decompress. Unfortunately that would not be something I could do at this time, but if I could get away for a week would be a good start for me.
I hope that this path I am on begins to make sense to me and show me what is waiting ahead. This journey has been long and far from over, but hopefully it will start showing me the way.
Friday, February 13, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 44...A Change in the Wind
Yesterday, I had to put my foot down and stand up for myself in this online relationship which has been developing between me and Chad. All I could get out of this man when I discussed with him the option of a phone call was, "maybe". Prodding further he confessed he does not like to talk on the phone. I explained to him that it was what I needed from him if we were to make this into a relationship. Our conversation ended early and I went to bed with a heavy heart.
This morning I messaged him and said "good morning" and wished him a good day. I noticed he read it right away, but I did not hear back from him. My heart gradually grew heavier and heavier as the day went on and by the time I left work I was in tears. I knew I was taking a risk getting to know someone online, however, I found myself really into this man. I tried to tell myself to just forget about him, and at a light I was texting my sweet and amazing friend Ernie confiding that I had not heard from Chad and I was sad. Then the tears began to flow. I sat in my friends driveway crying and telling myself I was so stupid and that he was not who he had been saying who he was to me.
Finally, at the gym I sent him a message that simply said, "you've been quiet today" and I left it at that with my efforts. While on the treadmill several minutes went by and I began to tell myself I had to accept this was not going to happen. I had already prayed to God asking Him to please just let this for once work out and let me have a good man in my life. I am ready for this next stage in my life and I have been incredibly curious to see where Chad could fit into my life.
Several more minutes went by and I noticed the red light on my phone blinking. He wrote back. "busy. pissed" I asked what was going on. Turns out as he was getting loaded he discovered his trailer brake lights were not working. Therefore, he could not go anywhere until they got the trailer fixed. He was at a garage in West Virginia and his load needed to get to South Carolina, so he would not be going home this weekend. I asked if there was anything I could do to try and make his situation better. He replied with, "no I am just in one of my moods". Not knowing how to react to this I wanted to be respectful and followed with, "Want me to leave you alone"? To be honest I felt like my heart was in a balance wondering what his response would be. When you are having a bad day out on the road sometimes a distraction is not what you need. A smile was brought to my face when he replied, "No, ur good" He wanted to talk to me, which made my heart sing.
This conversation finally lead to me asking if there was a chance for us to see one another. His reply was hopeful and I finally asked if he would be up for a suggestion. When he replied with "What is it?" I put it out there and asked if he would be interested in meeting half way and getting a hotel for the weekend.
I was surprised by his response. Turns out he has been thinking of coming to see me. Apparently he has an option to request where he goes for the weekend and was going to ask his company to let him take a load to Nashville! I pressed for more information regarding this and he told me that he would be in town Friday and would not have to get his load to its destination until Monday. Therefore, we could spend the entire weekend together.
He has been thinking of me and wanting to come and see me. God has answered a prayer. I would like to think it is possible for me to have the entire package in life. A successful photography business, a successful writing career and a loving man in my life.
Talking to Ernie about this before, during and after talking to Chad I was deeply moved by her incredibly kind words. She first she replied to my comments to her:
La: "Sometimes I feel I'm one of those people who wont' get to. Like-me wanting to "have it all with a great career, good man, house and property" the dream
Ernie: "You will. I believe it and speak it into existence"
Who is so fortunate and blessed to have such amazing kindness and good sent to God and the Universe like that in life?
She then replied: "I mean every word too!!! You are awesome. Loving. Generous. Kind. Selfless. Conscientious. A man should be honored to have you in his life."
When I read that I burst into tears. My heart was bursting, my cup floweth over
"You're my friend and deserve only the best"
From having a heavy heart to high hopes of a visit from this man I have met online. I never thought of myself as being an online dating person. Yet, with the way life has evolved, it is a great way to meet someone. I have dated a few men I have met online, one I got into a very bizarre relationship with off and on for over a year. It feels really good to have a man who has found me and wants to drive across the country to see me. I am fortunate he has a career in which will allow him the opportunity to travel where he wants.
He told me he cannot make this request while he has a trainee with him. I asked how soon he would be putting in his request once the trainee was gone and I brightened up by his reply: "ASAP". It cannot get any more clear than that to me.
There has been a change in the wind with Chad. Maybe a change that was brought on by prayer, possibly fate. Only time will tell. Until then, I can at least go to sleep tonight knowing I get to meet this man in person soon and feel his arms around me.
Maybe I will be able to find my way to having it all...
This morning I messaged him and said "good morning" and wished him a good day. I noticed he read it right away, but I did not hear back from him. My heart gradually grew heavier and heavier as the day went on and by the time I left work I was in tears. I knew I was taking a risk getting to know someone online, however, I found myself really into this man. I tried to tell myself to just forget about him, and at a light I was texting my sweet and amazing friend Ernie confiding that I had not heard from Chad and I was sad. Then the tears began to flow. I sat in my friends driveway crying and telling myself I was so stupid and that he was not who he had been saying who he was to me.
Finally, at the gym I sent him a message that simply said, "you've been quiet today" and I left it at that with my efforts. While on the treadmill several minutes went by and I began to tell myself I had to accept this was not going to happen. I had already prayed to God asking Him to please just let this for once work out and let me have a good man in my life. I am ready for this next stage in my life and I have been incredibly curious to see where Chad could fit into my life.
Several more minutes went by and I noticed the red light on my phone blinking. He wrote back. "busy. pissed" I asked what was going on. Turns out as he was getting loaded he discovered his trailer brake lights were not working. Therefore, he could not go anywhere until they got the trailer fixed. He was at a garage in West Virginia and his load needed to get to South Carolina, so he would not be going home this weekend. I asked if there was anything I could do to try and make his situation better. He replied with, "no I am just in one of my moods". Not knowing how to react to this I wanted to be respectful and followed with, "Want me to leave you alone"? To be honest I felt like my heart was in a balance wondering what his response would be. When you are having a bad day out on the road sometimes a distraction is not what you need. A smile was brought to my face when he replied, "No, ur good" He wanted to talk to me, which made my heart sing.
This conversation finally lead to me asking if there was a chance for us to see one another. His reply was hopeful and I finally asked if he would be up for a suggestion. When he replied with "What is it?" I put it out there and asked if he would be interested in meeting half way and getting a hotel for the weekend.
I was surprised by his response. Turns out he has been thinking of coming to see me. Apparently he has an option to request where he goes for the weekend and was going to ask his company to let him take a load to Nashville! I pressed for more information regarding this and he told me that he would be in town Friday and would not have to get his load to its destination until Monday. Therefore, we could spend the entire weekend together.
He has been thinking of me and wanting to come and see me. God has answered a prayer. I would like to think it is possible for me to have the entire package in life. A successful photography business, a successful writing career and a loving man in my life.
Talking to Ernie about this before, during and after talking to Chad I was deeply moved by her incredibly kind words. She first she replied to my comments to her:
La: "Sometimes I feel I'm one of those people who wont' get to. Like-me wanting to "have it all with a great career, good man, house and property" the dream
Ernie: "You will. I believe it and speak it into existence"
Who is so fortunate and blessed to have such amazing kindness and good sent to God and the Universe like that in life?
She then replied: "I mean every word too!!! You are awesome. Loving. Generous. Kind. Selfless. Conscientious. A man should be honored to have you in his life."
When I read that I burst into tears. My heart was bursting, my cup floweth over
"You're my friend and deserve only the best"
From having a heavy heart to high hopes of a visit from this man I have met online. I never thought of myself as being an online dating person. Yet, with the way life has evolved, it is a great way to meet someone. I have dated a few men I have met online, one I got into a very bizarre relationship with off and on for over a year. It feels really good to have a man who has found me and wants to drive across the country to see me. I am fortunate he has a career in which will allow him the opportunity to travel where he wants.
He told me he cannot make this request while he has a trainee with him. I asked how soon he would be putting in his request once the trainee was gone and I brightened up by his reply: "ASAP". It cannot get any more clear than that to me.
There has been a change in the wind with Chad. Maybe a change that was brought on by prayer, possibly fate. Only time will tell. Until then, I can at least go to sleep tonight knowing I get to meet this man in person soon and feel his arms around me.
Maybe I will be able to find my way to having it all...
Thursday, February 12, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 43...Online Dating
When you date someone who you meet online, you don't always know what you are going to get in the process.
I have met a man named, Chad, who I have found myself quite interested in. Unfortunately, he refuses to call me and it is turning into a red flag. I gently brought it into the discussion and firmly held on to it. This is now something which is important to me with this individual who I have been in conversation with for four weeks. One month ago (technically today as it is the time of writing-Jan 11 is when he reached out to me).
I am not sure how to get someone who claims they are interested in me to call when they do not want to. I said to him, "I am a woman who is worthy and of value. I am confident enough to say I am worthy of a phone call."
I asked him "didn't you say you wanted to see what happens?"
he replied, "I did"
Then I went further on to get the change in the life that we want, to be the change that we want to be in our lives we sometime have to step outside our comfort zone.
The subject didn't really go into a deep conversation except for him to say he does not like to talk on the phone.
Our conversation was the shortest it has ever been. I'm letting sleeping dogs lie and walking away, sad. I had hoped maybe this guy was someone who would become quite special in my life.
While catching up on my daily read, my book said the following, which really resonated with me.
..."When you learn what you can live without, you are able to ask life for the very best because you possess the gift of discernment. You develop patience that enables you to wait gracefully and gratefully until the best arrives because you know it will."...
As I am sad to let Chad go, I know I need to because I deserve a man who will want to be with me. I'm starting to feel he is bull-shitting me and I don't want to play his game. My heart wants him to be honest and true. My head is telling me he isn't. What am I suppose to do if I cannot get a phone call from him?
Onward we go, into the dark to see where things will take me. I am ready for a change and I am hoping some positive things begin to take affect soon.
Good night Dark Reaper, sweet ChadJr76, I wish you nothing but the best and will think of you fondly.
I have met a man named, Chad, who I have found myself quite interested in. Unfortunately, he refuses to call me and it is turning into a red flag. I gently brought it into the discussion and firmly held on to it. This is now something which is important to me with this individual who I have been in conversation with for four weeks. One month ago (technically today as it is the time of writing-Jan 11 is when he reached out to me).
I am not sure how to get someone who claims they are interested in me to call when they do not want to. I said to him, "I am a woman who is worthy and of value. I am confident enough to say I am worthy of a phone call."
I asked him "didn't you say you wanted to see what happens?"
he replied, "I did"
Then I went further on to get the change in the life that we want, to be the change that we want to be in our lives we sometime have to step outside our comfort zone.
The subject didn't really go into a deep conversation except for him to say he does not like to talk on the phone.
Our conversation was the shortest it has ever been. I'm letting sleeping dogs lie and walking away, sad. I had hoped maybe this guy was someone who would become quite special in my life.
While catching up on my daily read, my book said the following, which really resonated with me.
..."When you learn what you can live without, you are able to ask life for the very best because you possess the gift of discernment. You develop patience that enables you to wait gracefully and gratefully until the best arrives because you know it will."...
As I am sad to let Chad go, I know I need to because I deserve a man who will want to be with me. I'm starting to feel he is bull-shitting me and I don't want to play his game. My heart wants him to be honest and true. My head is telling me he isn't. What am I suppose to do if I cannot get a phone call from him?
Onward we go, into the dark to see where things will take me. I am ready for a change and I am hoping some positive things begin to take affect soon.
Good night Dark Reaper, sweet ChadJr76, I wish you nothing but the best and will think of you fondly.
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 42...Beauty Challenge
One of my stunning model friends on Facebook was nominated for a Beauty Challenge. This challenge is to take a photo of yourself with no make up and post it. This is not always easy for women to do as we try to hide our flaws and enhance our features with make up.
The woman who was participating in this challenge is naturally beautiful. I have seen her walk into a photo session without any make up and look gorgeous. She is as sweet as can be and you cannot help but fall in love with her spirit!
How surprised was I when she put me into the list of women she nominated for a Beauty Challenge. One of the reasons I strive to do Boudoir and enhance my clients experiences is because I know those voices in our heads very well. They can be incredibly damaging. You can feel good about yourself with head high and proud. Then you step into a restroom at a restaurant and see someone who just glimmers with a skinny body, perfectly styled hair and a beautiful face and BAM! We no longer think we are good enough. We all have that inner goddess which resides within who longs to come out and play. We deserve it. It IS OKAY to say "I am beautiful" and find peace with it.
Yet, many of us continue to struggle.
So, I took on this challenge, I woke up, washed my face and snapped a pic with my cell phone. I was surprised by the support and kind comments I received on Facebook. To have my friends and Facebook friends tell me I am beautiful, that it was a stunning pic of me. It made me think maybe I need to squash those negative thoughts in my head? Maybe that little girl inside me who was always told she was ugly can be free of her sadness? Growing up I was never the prettiest girl in the class. Being in a small town everyone knew everyone and we all had our "roles" in school. I would look in the mirror and think "ugly duckling" and wonder if ever I would grow into a swan.
Yesterday, I thanked the woman who put me on the list of this challenge. As it has helped me grow as a person, as a woman and accept that I am beautiful, just like I have always wanted to be. Our beauty is not just something on the outside. It is also how we carry ourselves as a person. Beauty truly resonates from within. You can have flawless skin, perfect cheekbones, well groomed eye brows, but if you have a bad attitude, it does not matter how beautiful you are, because it makes you ugly.
Maybe...just maybe...I am finally that swan I have always wanted to be.
The woman who was participating in this challenge is naturally beautiful. I have seen her walk into a photo session without any make up and look gorgeous. She is as sweet as can be and you cannot help but fall in love with her spirit!
How surprised was I when she put me into the list of women she nominated for a Beauty Challenge. One of the reasons I strive to do Boudoir and enhance my clients experiences is because I know those voices in our heads very well. They can be incredibly damaging. You can feel good about yourself with head high and proud. Then you step into a restroom at a restaurant and see someone who just glimmers with a skinny body, perfectly styled hair and a beautiful face and BAM! We no longer think we are good enough. We all have that inner goddess which resides within who longs to come out and play. We deserve it. It IS OKAY to say "I am beautiful" and find peace with it.
Yet, many of us continue to struggle.
So, I took on this challenge, I woke up, washed my face and snapped a pic with my cell phone. I was surprised by the support and kind comments I received on Facebook. To have my friends and Facebook friends tell me I am beautiful, that it was a stunning pic of me. It made me think maybe I need to squash those negative thoughts in my head? Maybe that little girl inside me who was always told she was ugly can be free of her sadness? Growing up I was never the prettiest girl in the class. Being in a small town everyone knew everyone and we all had our "roles" in school. I would look in the mirror and think "ugly duckling" and wonder if ever I would grow into a swan.
Yesterday, I thanked the woman who put me on the list of this challenge. As it has helped me grow as a person, as a woman and accept that I am beautiful, just like I have always wanted to be. Our beauty is not just something on the outside. It is also how we carry ourselves as a person. Beauty truly resonates from within. You can have flawless skin, perfect cheekbones, well groomed eye brows, but if you have a bad attitude, it does not matter how beautiful you are, because it makes you ugly.
Maybe...just maybe...I am finally that swan I have always wanted to be.
This is me, no make up, no filter on the camera. I had not even brushed my hair yet.
Find a way to embrace your own beauty-you have the right to be comfortable in your own skin.
Find a way to embrace your own beauty-you have the right to be comfortable in your own skin.
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 41...Unproductive Day
Sunday ended up being a very unproductive day. I got up early to be productive, and just could not quite make myself do much of anything. Lost in thought trying to figure out life. The realization of the great possibility that I have taken on too much has been lingering. I need to get things off my plate if I want to live this simple life which rings within me. I also need to get things off my plate if I want the necessary time to focus on my business.
I wanted to go and explore my favorite park in Davidson County, but decided to change my mind when the light changed and changed lanes. Sometimes the budget mindedness takes over and it makes me sad I can’t just take off and go explore like I want.
My life is not where I want it and has not been for quite some time. I’m facing doubt on how to get there. It makes me sad, and frustrated. If only I could get some indication I am on the right path. If I could just see faster progress.
Instead I face the fear of the unknown, the “what if’s” which go through my head. This upcoming week I am sending out two queries. They are my very first attempt to become a published and paid writer. I’m not sure what to expect or where it may lead my writing career, if there even is a potential for a writing career.
As I think of my photography I cannot help but ask myself, ‘why have I chosen (if I have even chosen) two of the most difficult career paths to pursue?’ I want to believe I am tough enough, smart enough to figure it out and make it happen. Fear is a powerful thing and I am face to face with it right now. Just trying to figure it all out.
Monday, February 9, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 40...Unhappy & Unsettled
I have been thrown for a loop. For several years now there has been a piece of property 10 minutes from Nashville that I have been dreaming of owning. With the property overpriced it has sat on the market for quiet some time. This had been my hope if I worked hard enough and got my business and writing underway, there could be potential for me to be able to buy this land.
Recently, discovering this property has been split and sold to two different new owners my heart has sank. Now I have a residing confusion. For years I have been thinking Nashville would be my home along with my parents farm in Wisconsin. Now I don't know. Where am I meant to be? The struggle that I am facing is it pushing me to build me up or break me down? Is God trying to tell me it is time for a change? As I drive the streets of Nashville and look out I cannot seem myself leaving just yet. I am feeling unsettled and honestly, sad.
For the first time in quite some time I am not joyously happy. Don't get me wrong, I have joy in my life and I am a happy person. But, I am not happy with where I am currently residing. I have a dumpy space, I don't even like to qualify it as an apartment. While the search for a better paying job is in progress, the underlying stress is increasing.
Change is hard and I have endured a lot of change in my life. There are many reasons I have stayed in Nashville. Once I got to Nashville I was pretty tired of moving. My life has been in transition more often than I would prefer. But, it has given me a great variety of my life experiences. Another reason why I have stayed here is how quaint this "big" city is and how it is a big melting pot. It is not always easy to find a true "Nashvillian". I am fortunate enough to have been able to meet and make good friends with many people who are locals. But, the biggest draw to this city for me has been the fact that within minutes you can be in the country. My heart has longed for the country since I left little Rice Lake, WI for my four year college in River Falls, WI. I would go out to lab farm one and sit on the fence and watch the school horses, just to get a touch of something familiar. Living in an apartment is not something I find ideal. Driving down city streets with endless rows of houses and cars has become something in which I have adapted to, but it is not my preference.
When I lived out in Scottsboro, TN, I was in heaven. It was still too close to heavy traffic as I lived right off Ashland City Hwy, however, I found my zen. Scottsboro is between Nashville and Ashland City, a very small community which is full of love, life and good people.
I would wake in the morning and be grateful for my country home. My chickens would wait for me to let them out and feed them. The garden took to my tending as I would plant, water and weed it and watch the harvest come and go. Surrounded by 200 acres which had fields, woods and across the road the Cumberland River. It was not uncommon to watch the hawks swirl and dive in the field next to the house
I loved it because I could be in the country. Something which I have longed to be back to since that day I left. I was able to be close to a large city so I could maintain a decent paying job. My goal with my photography and writing is to be able to support myself, and live where ever I want and travel whenever I want. For quite some time I have pictured this property which I have had my heart set on and visualized endlessly a house, a place for my chickens along with a garage and my photography studio. Now it is gone and I don't know what to do or think. Granted it could always come back up for sale. Maybe there is a better piece of property waiting for me. Maybe I'm not meant to own property here at all?
A dear friend and his wife have been discussing retiring in North Carolina. For quite some time that seemed years off. Now, that plan for them is in motion and in approximately three years they plan on being gone. Another friend wants to return to California. These individuals have been my base and I know as I will wish them well and all the best, my heart will be sad when they leave.
I cannot help but wonder if maybe I am meant to head back to Wisconsin. But, beyond the farm which I love so much, there is no career there for me. If I had my plans more in motion I would at least be able to travel more frequently and get home more often. I have met a lot of people who have two places of residence. Especially here in Nashville, a lot of musicians make Nashville their second home and I can completely understand why. Beyond they need to be here for the music, it is an easy place for them to love due to such a great and warm community.
While I feel now I have no idea where I am meant to be or what I am meant to do. I love photography and getting that business up and running is no easy task. I know if I quit and walked away once again I will find myself in a heap and in tears. As I would like to be able to sit back and not worry about it, I cannot help but wonder where life is trying to lead me. What is God trying to communicate to me? I wish I had better guidance on whether or not I am on the right track and where things are going to go.
Until I have further insight, I will continue to push onward. Hopefully a sign will come forward to help me see I am on the right track.
Recently, discovering this property has been split and sold to two different new owners my heart has sank. Now I have a residing confusion. For years I have been thinking Nashville would be my home along with my parents farm in Wisconsin. Now I don't know. Where am I meant to be? The struggle that I am facing is it pushing me to build me up or break me down? Is God trying to tell me it is time for a change? As I drive the streets of Nashville and look out I cannot seem myself leaving just yet. I am feeling unsettled and honestly, sad.
For the first time in quite some time I am not joyously happy. Don't get me wrong, I have joy in my life and I am a happy person. But, I am not happy with where I am currently residing. I have a dumpy space, I don't even like to qualify it as an apartment. While the search for a better paying job is in progress, the underlying stress is increasing.
Change is hard and I have endured a lot of change in my life. There are many reasons I have stayed in Nashville. Once I got to Nashville I was pretty tired of moving. My life has been in transition more often than I would prefer. But, it has given me a great variety of my life experiences. Another reason why I have stayed here is how quaint this "big" city is and how it is a big melting pot. It is not always easy to find a true "Nashvillian". I am fortunate enough to have been able to meet and make good friends with many people who are locals. But, the biggest draw to this city for me has been the fact that within minutes you can be in the country. My heart has longed for the country since I left little Rice Lake, WI for my four year college in River Falls, WI. I would go out to lab farm one and sit on the fence and watch the school horses, just to get a touch of something familiar. Living in an apartment is not something I find ideal. Driving down city streets with endless rows of houses and cars has become something in which I have adapted to, but it is not my preference.
When I lived out in Scottsboro, TN, I was in heaven. It was still too close to heavy traffic as I lived right off Ashland City Hwy, however, I found my zen. Scottsboro is between Nashville and Ashland City, a very small community which is full of love, life and good people.
I would wake in the morning and be grateful for my country home. My chickens would wait for me to let them out and feed them. The garden took to my tending as I would plant, water and weed it and watch the harvest come and go. Surrounded by 200 acres which had fields, woods and across the road the Cumberland River. It was not uncommon to watch the hawks swirl and dive in the field next to the house
I loved it because I could be in the country. Something which I have longed to be back to since that day I left. I was able to be close to a large city so I could maintain a decent paying job. My goal with my photography and writing is to be able to support myself, and live where ever I want and travel whenever I want. For quite some time I have pictured this property which I have had my heart set on and visualized endlessly a house, a place for my chickens along with a garage and my photography studio. Now it is gone and I don't know what to do or think. Granted it could always come back up for sale. Maybe there is a better piece of property waiting for me. Maybe I'm not meant to own property here at all?
A dear friend and his wife have been discussing retiring in North Carolina. For quite some time that seemed years off. Now, that plan for them is in motion and in approximately three years they plan on being gone. Another friend wants to return to California. These individuals have been my base and I know as I will wish them well and all the best, my heart will be sad when they leave.
I cannot help but wonder if maybe I am meant to head back to Wisconsin. But, beyond the farm which I love so much, there is no career there for me. If I had my plans more in motion I would at least be able to travel more frequently and get home more often. I have met a lot of people who have two places of residence. Especially here in Nashville, a lot of musicians make Nashville their second home and I can completely understand why. Beyond they need to be here for the music, it is an easy place for them to love due to such a great and warm community.
While I feel now I have no idea where I am meant to be or what I am meant to do. I love photography and getting that business up and running is no easy task. I know if I quit and walked away once again I will find myself in a heap and in tears. As I would like to be able to sit back and not worry about it, I cannot help but wonder where life is trying to lead me. What is God trying to communicate to me? I wish I had better guidance on whether or not I am on the right track and where things are going to go.
Until I have further insight, I will continue to push onward. Hopefully a sign will come forward to help me see I am on the right track.
Sunday, February 8, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 39...Dream Property Sold
There is a piece of property just outside of Nashville which I have had my eye on for several years now. It is out in the country near the Cumberland River. It is where I thought I would one day build my house, have my chickens and photography studio in the backyard. There is a photo of this property is on my vision board with me holding a "for sale" sign.
Less than a month ago I noticed something, the for sale sign was gone. There was a bulldozer which was making tracks and my heart sank.
Friday I found out that yes, the property has sold. It was divided up and there are two owners.
Considering for quite some time I have pictured myself living on this property I feel this loss and confusion within me. I am perplexed by if I will ever own this property, if it was just not meant to be and what am I suppose to do? Maybe I am not meant to be in Nashville. I am always open to change. However, after so many years of moving, being in this one spot, I have worked to create my community and my home here. While visualizing my business I have pictured living in two different places in the country. Here and Wisconsin. But, now that this "dream" property of mine has sold, maybe "here" isn't where I am suppose to be? Driving around town after work today I felt an internal struggle. No, I am not a city girl. Yes, I long to be back in the country. Yet, I have a hard time with not being here, if I am not here, I have this pull to be here. Is that because it has become comfortable? Is it because I do like it here so much?
A dear friend is getting ready to prepare property in North Carolina so he and his wife can pack up and relocate. This is going to be very difficult for me to deal with when it happens. They have been a place of solitude, comfort and family for me here. Yet, they are in a place in their lives where they are ready to retire and live their life in the country and on their beach house.
I am experiencing this lost feeling inside me. I realize I don't have to figure things out right now. Yet, I have been planning for quite some time of having a house and my studio here. Having my business here with staff to help me run it. Traveling with my photography and writing. Now I sit here perplexed, what is the plan? Where am I meant to be? Even though this is nothing for me to figure out right now, and there could always be a way for that property to go up for sale again, I am bombarded with confusion. I thought I had it all figured out. Now I am not so sure.
While there is a bigger plan in the works for me. While I know God is at the wheel of my life and I am trying to trust Him as he guides me, I'm suddenly feeling unsettled and uncertain.
I have taken on a lot in this journey of my life. I am definitely running a little scared wondering if I have taken on too much. With hesitation, but knowing it was for the best, I dropped the photography workshops I have been trying to coordinate and instruct. It had to come off the plate as I felt it was dragging me down and my business was suffering.
Now I am facing this charity event and I am wondering what have I taken upon myself? This is a huge endeavor and as I want to believe I can handle it...the level of risk in which I am taking is extremely great. Yet, the wheels are in motion and it is sink or swim time. I do not want to fail. Hopefully I will be able to pull this off and once it is over, decide it if is worth while to try again.
Have you ever had something throw you? Ever have a plan in which you could see things working out in your favor and then suddenly, a wrench was tossed into the mix. Leading you to uncertainty of what is meant to be. Making you wonder what direction is your life is suppose to go? Did you have it all wrong?
While I ponder all these things all I know to do is push onward and pray. Hopefully an answer will come to me while I figure it out. I know God is showing me the way to the life He has in mind for me. I know it will be great, but for now, I am tossed for a loop of thoughts and questions of where I am going and where I am meant to be.
These are all things I do not need to figure out right now. Yet, some direction and guidance of where I am suppose to be and where I am suppose to go would be greatly appreciated right now. While I had a plan, dealing with my current situation made it tolerable. Now, wondering if this property was never meant to be for me has me unsettled and stressed.
I cannot help but wonder if this property being sold to someone else is an indication I am not meant to be here in Nashville. I love it here. I have friends who are like family here. It is a place where I have been the longest since I left little Rice Lake, Wisconsin for college. Of course, that does not mean I was meant to be here forever. But, now I don't know what anything means.
Less than a month ago I noticed something, the for sale sign was gone. There was a bulldozer which was making tracks and my heart sank.
Friday I found out that yes, the property has sold. It was divided up and there are two owners.
Considering for quite some time I have pictured myself living on this property I feel this loss and confusion within me. I am perplexed by if I will ever own this property, if it was just not meant to be and what am I suppose to do? Maybe I am not meant to be in Nashville. I am always open to change. However, after so many years of moving, being in this one spot, I have worked to create my community and my home here. While visualizing my business I have pictured living in two different places in the country. Here and Wisconsin. But, now that this "dream" property of mine has sold, maybe "here" isn't where I am suppose to be? Driving around town after work today I felt an internal struggle. No, I am not a city girl. Yes, I long to be back in the country. Yet, I have a hard time with not being here, if I am not here, I have this pull to be here. Is that because it has become comfortable? Is it because I do like it here so much?
A dear friend is getting ready to prepare property in North Carolina so he and his wife can pack up and relocate. This is going to be very difficult for me to deal with when it happens. They have been a place of solitude, comfort and family for me here. Yet, they are in a place in their lives where they are ready to retire and live their life in the country and on their beach house.
I am experiencing this lost feeling inside me. I realize I don't have to figure things out right now. Yet, I have been planning for quite some time of having a house and my studio here. Having my business here with staff to help me run it. Traveling with my photography and writing. Now I sit here perplexed, what is the plan? Where am I meant to be? Even though this is nothing for me to figure out right now, and there could always be a way for that property to go up for sale again, I am bombarded with confusion. I thought I had it all figured out. Now I am not so sure.
While there is a bigger plan in the works for me. While I know God is at the wheel of my life and I am trying to trust Him as he guides me, I'm suddenly feeling unsettled and uncertain.
I have taken on a lot in this journey of my life. I am definitely running a little scared wondering if I have taken on too much. With hesitation, but knowing it was for the best, I dropped the photography workshops I have been trying to coordinate and instruct. It had to come off the plate as I felt it was dragging me down and my business was suffering.
Now I am facing this charity event and I am wondering what have I taken upon myself? This is a huge endeavor and as I want to believe I can handle it...the level of risk in which I am taking is extremely great. Yet, the wheels are in motion and it is sink or swim time. I do not want to fail. Hopefully I will be able to pull this off and once it is over, decide it if is worth while to try again.
Have you ever had something throw you? Ever have a plan in which you could see things working out in your favor and then suddenly, a wrench was tossed into the mix. Leading you to uncertainty of what is meant to be. Making you wonder what direction is your life is suppose to go? Did you have it all wrong?
While I ponder all these things all I know to do is push onward and pray. Hopefully an answer will come to me while I figure it out. I know God is showing me the way to the life He has in mind for me. I know it will be great, but for now, I am tossed for a loop of thoughts and questions of where I am going and where I am meant to be.
These are all things I do not need to figure out right now. Yet, some direction and guidance of where I am suppose to be and where I am suppose to go would be greatly appreciated right now. While I had a plan, dealing with my current situation made it tolerable. Now, wondering if this property was never meant to be for me has me unsettled and stressed.
I cannot help but wonder if this property being sold to someone else is an indication I am not meant to be here in Nashville. I love it here. I have friends who are like family here. It is a place where I have been the longest since I left little Rice Lake, Wisconsin for college. Of course, that does not mean I was meant to be here forever. But, now I don't know what anything means.
Saturday, February 7, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 38...Dating
While writing this evening I over heard a conversation at Panera between two women. One was discussing how she took a chance on
getting to know a guy she found to be attractive. Over the duration of 18 months she would
invite him to go do thing occasionally.
They would drift apart and then back together, she just let things
develop as they may. She didn’t put pressure
on it, then after not hearing from him for several months he contacted
her. They began to spend time together,
became a couple and now they are engaged to be married. It took three years – but they found each
other and looking forward to where things will take them in life.
Their discussion also went into how a partner needs to be beneficial to you. How one should keep in mind with in a partnership to think of the other
person before you think of yourself.
One of the women brought up a mutual friend of theirs who was dating someone. She spoke how this friend was someone who loves to dance, move and enjoy the music. She further stated how her boyfriend
won’t even try to dance with her and she asked her, "what are you doing with him"? She expressed how her friend does all these weird
things that he wants to go out and do, yet he won’t make the effort to even try
to dance with her. This woman that was being
referenced would state how it hurt her heart and when she discussed it the
couple would end up in a big fight. The woman further went on stating how he
can convince her that dancing is bad, and her friend is worried that she will
lose herself. That she is weird, fun, creative
and expressive person. This man in her
life tries to keep her in a box and squander her creative personality. Isn't it interesting how we come across these individuals we date and fall in love with who are not right and unhealthy for us. Love is not easy. Love, at least for me is hard. Finding that right mate is an interesting challenge and often I wonder if it is easier to give up and be alone than try to find someone who is good for me.
These two women also spoke about how at some time in our
lives we need to be okay with having love in our life. How we need to accept that it is okay to be loved
and we deserve to be loved. It is a risk
we need to be willing to take to go after love.
Maybe it won’t work out, then we need to find a way to move on. Or we need to learn how to be without. As we move on we find a strength within us we
didn’t know was there before. While
break ups suck and they are painful, we can find an ability to grow as a
person, it shapes who we are as a person.
I went through an extremely painful break up 18 months ago, within a couple months healing began to take place. At the time I desperately wanted that time to pass quickly so I would no longer hurt. My love for playing my fiddle was overcome by the pain I faced and I would burst into tears just picking up my violin case. However, there was that bittersweet day when I was able to pick up that case, open it, tune my fiddle and play. While my heart ached as I pulled the bow across the strings, it was a step towards a healthier life for me. Then there was the healing day when I left a photography club meeting and drove down the interstate with great relief knowing I would not be yelled at when I got in for the night. It was a moment of empowerment where I could realize that I was better off without than with someone who did not appreciate me.
At the time I forced myself to make peace that I would never be with anyone ever again. The thought of taking the risk to experience being yelled at, physically threatened, physically hit, verbally and emotionally bashed was not a path I was willing to take. There was a dark day in my life when I had to look myself in the mirror and accept I was in a verbally abusive relationship. There was another dark day when I had to realize I did not know how to get out.
Then it all came crashing down one day when I walked into the home, happy to greet my boyfriend I loved so much-and was trying so hard to make the relationship work. Instead of a return of joy, I was asked to sit down because we had to talk. It was at this time the man who I loved broke my heart, kicked me out of our house (I had no where to go) & was firing me from my job (I worked for him). While I packed to get out of the house he became very aggressive. Once out of the home he continued to badger and threaten me. I unfortunately needed to get a lawyer to get him to leave me alone. Against the request of my lawyer, family and friends I never did put the restraining order on him-a decision I often regret.
I went through an extremely painful break up 18 months ago, within a couple months healing began to take place. At the time I desperately wanted that time to pass quickly so I would no longer hurt. My love for playing my fiddle was overcome by the pain I faced and I would burst into tears just picking up my violin case. However, there was that bittersweet day when I was able to pick up that case, open it, tune my fiddle and play. While my heart ached as I pulled the bow across the strings, it was a step towards a healthier life for me. Then there was the healing day when I left a photography club meeting and drove down the interstate with great relief knowing I would not be yelled at when I got in for the night. It was a moment of empowerment where I could realize that I was better off without than with someone who did not appreciate me.
At the time I forced myself to make peace that I would never be with anyone ever again. The thought of taking the risk to experience being yelled at, physically threatened, physically hit, verbally and emotionally bashed was not a path I was willing to take. There was a dark day in my life when I had to look myself in the mirror and accept I was in a verbally abusive relationship. There was another dark day when I had to realize I did not know how to get out.
Then it all came crashing down one day when I walked into the home, happy to greet my boyfriend I loved so much-and was trying so hard to make the relationship work. Instead of a return of joy, I was asked to sit down because we had to talk. It was at this time the man who I loved broke my heart, kicked me out of our house (I had no where to go) & was firing me from my job (I worked for him). While I packed to get out of the house he became very aggressive. Once out of the home he continued to badger and threaten me. I unfortunately needed to get a lawyer to get him to leave me alone. Against the request of my lawyer, family and friends I never did put the restraining order on him-a decision I often regret.
In November, after the Nunley Mountain
cave trip I attended my friends began to tell me how I needed to be open to
love again. I responded with great
hesitation and distaste. I had put
myself in the category of “being alone forever” and fear took over reminding me
of the behavior I experienced.
Conversations with my friends would return stating how I had a good
heart, I was a good person and I needed to open myself to it and date
again. *gasp* Dating.
Oh how I hate dating, it is awkward, it is uncomfortable and I don’t
know how to do it well.
Looking around I didn’t see much for prospects and I am not one to ask someone out. Anytime I have ever asked a boy or man out it has not gone well. The answer has always been no and as hesitant as I was to step into the dating world, walking into rejection was not something that interested me. A dear friend had been actively dating with men she had met online, so I approached her about it. She first directed me to craigslist. This lead to a few dates with men who I was keeping casual. Some didn’t call again and others I finally drifted away from not wanting to get serious. One night while out with this online dating friend she introduced me to OKCupid. Within less than a week a man contacted me asking me if I wanted to chat. I accepted and this has lead to over three weeks of continuous conversation. I find myself intrigued and curious. I have not met him yet as he is a truck driver and on the road. Unfortunately, I am quite interested in this man. Why would this be unfortunate? Because I did not know with the OKCupid app, it changes your location if you travel. When we first began to chat his location was Ashland City, TN. My sensors went up, as I found it interesting this attractive man, who lives in Ashland City, wanted to talk to me. I began to talk to him and it wasn’t until several days later I found out he was not from Ashland City at all, but instead West Virginia. The past few days I had to accept that I am attracted to this person. He makes me nervous as I am not sure how much of what he says is truth. After all we are online and anyone can be whoever they want to be online. There is also a worry that he could be talking to many other women and just leading me on. Thursday night we got into a pretty deep conversation which could have ended our potential path of “what could happen”? Realizing I said to much I walked into my Thursday night Zumba class with sadness. I suck at dating and I had fucked up. The last message I had received from him stated, “maybe we need to slow down” Slow down, how can we slow down when we haven’t even met one another? While in my Zumba class as I was punching the air, twisting and jumping I made peace that God is in charge of what is happening. If I had screwed up then I was suppose to screw up to close the door on this man which would open the door to someone else. While in class I had come up with a calm and passive thought that I would pass along to him and let the cards lie where they may. After class I sent him the message. Still bummed about my actions I drove to the gym to get a few minutes on a treadmill. He wrote back pretty quickly stating he was concerned about what could happen. I inquired what he meant by “what could happen”? He replied, if things don’t work out he didn’t want to see me get hurt. This set something off in me, and I wrote how he couldn’t break me. How I was not a flower, but a woman. I stated I may be soft and sensitive, but no one would ever get me down. I explained how I relocated 900 miles to end up having someone cheat on me for six months. I was able to overcome that heartache. How if I can over come having someone who broke my heart and with all his power and might tried to destroy me as a person, then I can take anything. Further stated how these things make me stronger. If I get hurt, I boo hoo, pick myself up and move forward.
Then I followed it with how I am a half glass full kind of person and what if things did work out? How I am not a side lines kind of gal. Instead I am the kind of girl who would rather take a risk and live her life. I was surprised by his response, “k, let’s see what happens. K?”
Why not – so I responded, “let’s see what happens”
This is a long distance relationship starting with an online presence with no idea when we will see one another. Is that stupid? Maybe setting ourselves up for failure? I don’t know. But, what I do know is how I feel when his name shows up on my phone. How I react when I talk with him. Why not take a chance? Maybe I will end up broken hearted and rejected. I won’t know unless I try. So, with both feet I have jumped in and now only time will tell what is meant to happen.
Looking around I didn’t see much for prospects and I am not one to ask someone out. Anytime I have ever asked a boy or man out it has not gone well. The answer has always been no and as hesitant as I was to step into the dating world, walking into rejection was not something that interested me. A dear friend had been actively dating with men she had met online, so I approached her about it. She first directed me to craigslist. This lead to a few dates with men who I was keeping casual. Some didn’t call again and others I finally drifted away from not wanting to get serious. One night while out with this online dating friend she introduced me to OKCupid. Within less than a week a man contacted me asking me if I wanted to chat. I accepted and this has lead to over three weeks of continuous conversation. I find myself intrigued and curious. I have not met him yet as he is a truck driver and on the road. Unfortunately, I am quite interested in this man. Why would this be unfortunate? Because I did not know with the OKCupid app, it changes your location if you travel. When we first began to chat his location was Ashland City, TN. My sensors went up, as I found it interesting this attractive man, who lives in Ashland City, wanted to talk to me. I began to talk to him and it wasn’t until several days later I found out he was not from Ashland City at all, but instead West Virginia. The past few days I had to accept that I am attracted to this person. He makes me nervous as I am not sure how much of what he says is truth. After all we are online and anyone can be whoever they want to be online. There is also a worry that he could be talking to many other women and just leading me on. Thursday night we got into a pretty deep conversation which could have ended our potential path of “what could happen”? Realizing I said to much I walked into my Thursday night Zumba class with sadness. I suck at dating and I had fucked up. The last message I had received from him stated, “maybe we need to slow down” Slow down, how can we slow down when we haven’t even met one another? While in my Zumba class as I was punching the air, twisting and jumping I made peace that God is in charge of what is happening. If I had screwed up then I was suppose to screw up to close the door on this man which would open the door to someone else. While in class I had come up with a calm and passive thought that I would pass along to him and let the cards lie where they may. After class I sent him the message. Still bummed about my actions I drove to the gym to get a few minutes on a treadmill. He wrote back pretty quickly stating he was concerned about what could happen. I inquired what he meant by “what could happen”? He replied, if things don’t work out he didn’t want to see me get hurt. This set something off in me, and I wrote how he couldn’t break me. How I was not a flower, but a woman. I stated I may be soft and sensitive, but no one would ever get me down. I explained how I relocated 900 miles to end up having someone cheat on me for six months. I was able to overcome that heartache. How if I can over come having someone who broke my heart and with all his power and might tried to destroy me as a person, then I can take anything. Further stated how these things make me stronger. If I get hurt, I boo hoo, pick myself up and move forward.
Then I followed it with how I am a half glass full kind of person and what if things did work out? How I am not a side lines kind of gal. Instead I am the kind of girl who would rather take a risk and live her life. I was surprised by his response, “k, let’s see what happens. K?”
Why not – so I responded, “let’s see what happens”
This is a long distance relationship starting with an online presence with no idea when we will see one another. Is that stupid? Maybe setting ourselves up for failure? I don’t know. But, what I do know is how I feel when his name shows up on my phone. How I react when I talk with him. Why not take a chance? Maybe I will end up broken hearted and rejected. I won’t know unless I try. So, with both feet I have jumped in and now only time will tell what is meant to happen.
Friday, February 6, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focues On...page 37...Discover Your Inner Goddess
The Goddess Within...
With my photography I specialize in Boudoir Sessions. During these sessions we focus on helping our
client feel the absolute best about herself.
We all want to feel sexy, confident, proud of who we are as a
person. Unfortunately, we have the
voices of the mean kids who were on the school yard roaming in our heads. The voice of “we are not good enough” when we
see the super thin models on the covers of magazines.
I know these voices well as I battle them myself. Coming from an abusive relationship I had faced a struggle of being good enough. This uphill battle has not been easy and I look in the mirror now and I see someone who appreciates the good things in life and has discovered joy.
Women want to feel sexy. There is something about feeling sexy releases a level of endorphins which chocolate cannot tough. Whether it is a pair of shoes which we love because of how it shapes our legs, or a skirt with a slit just high enough to peak our thigh highs. Maybe we feel sexy drinking a glass of wine or Champaign. Whatever it is that makes you feel sexy - GO DO IT! We deserve as women to feel good about our curves, our intelligence, our beauty.
It IS ok to feel good about ourselves.
Find those things which diminish those feelings of sex appeal and confidence and eliminate them from your life. Those things are not healthy and you deserve to be ok with you and who you are as a woman.
Women want to feel sexy. There is something about feeling sexy releases a level of endorphins which chocolate cannot tough. Whether it is a pair of shoes which we love because of how it shapes our legs, or a skirt with a slit just high enough to peak our thigh highs. Maybe we feel sexy drinking a glass of wine or Champaign. Whatever it is that makes you feel sexy - GO DO IT! We deserve as women to feel good about our curves, our intelligence, our beauty.
It IS ok to feel good about ourselves.
Find those things which diminish those feelings of sex appeal and confidence and eliminate them from your life. Those things are not healthy and you deserve to be ok with you and who you are as a woman.
Embrace being a beautiful and sexy woman. Find a way to squash those negative thoughts that reside in your head. They don't do anyone any good.
Free yourself of the hate in your head and go explore those things in life which make YOU feel GOOD!
Discover that inner goddess which resides within, she wants to be released and celebrated.
Free yourself of the hate in your head and go explore those things in life which make YOU feel GOOD!
Discover that inner goddess which resides within, she wants to be released and celebrated.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
LaCresha's Lens Focuses On...page 36...Open to Change
The new year is well on its way. By now, many have forgotten about their New
Years Resolutions. Others are still
working on it, but unfortunately, will fade before summer hits.
Take on the challenge of your goals, maybe you want to
further discover who you are as a person.
This is often referenced as an “authentic self journey”. Take the time to appreciate yourself in small
ways like a quiet morning with coffee. Maybe a walk through a zoo or an Aquarium? Find a way to take a few moments for yourself in this fast pace world we live in. Have you tried meditation? What about walks through a city or state park?
These things take the effort of scheduling them in our lives. We can tell ourselves how we want to go and do something. However, we need to be the change that we want to see in ourselves and the world around us. Want a more peaceful living? Then you need to make the effort to obtain the peaceful living. With kids running around the living room, the dog jumping on the counter and knocking the dinner onto the floor, peace may seem endless miles away.
Yet, by establishing boundaries, setting down the determination to make it a part of your life it is possible. You have to want it. More than that, you need to want it badly enough to actually take the time to do it. Change won't happen unless you implement it.
What is it you long for in your life? Is it more peace? A healthier lifestyle? Maybe you desire to be more active? Take the time to decide what would make you a healthier and happier person. Then take the steps to achieve it. Schedule it like a doctors appointment and don't pull a no show. Life is too short to delay those simple pleasures in life.
These things take the effort of scheduling them in our lives. We can tell ourselves how we want to go and do something. However, we need to be the change that we want to see in ourselves and the world around us. Want a more peaceful living? Then you need to make the effort to obtain the peaceful living. With kids running around the living room, the dog jumping on the counter and knocking the dinner onto the floor, peace may seem endless miles away.
Yet, by establishing boundaries, setting down the determination to make it a part of your life it is possible. You have to want it. More than that, you need to want it badly enough to actually take the time to do it. Change won't happen unless you implement it.
What is it you long for in your life? Is it more peace? A healthier lifestyle? Maybe you desire to be more active? Take the time to decide what would make you a healthier and happier person. Then take the steps to achieve it. Schedule it like a doctors appointment and don't pull a no show. Life is too short to delay those simple pleasures in life.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)